Nowadays, many people have an unhealthy diet and do not exercise regularly. What are the reasons behind this trend? How can we encourage these people to live healthy lifestyles?
Sample Response
Past few decades, humankind put more weight on education and health regards. It is well-known that nowadays, many people’s dietsa host of humankind’s diet is unhealthy and they do not exercise oftenthey are not doing exercise often. In this essay, I discuss the reasons behind it and demonstrate how we can encourage them in the following paragraphs, along with a logical conclusion.
There are several reasons behind this problemtribulation. First and foremost, in this tech-savvy era, most people have a hectic work schedule, and life moves at a rapid pace, leaving people withlife is running on rate speed and have less time for other activities. As a result, they are not doing yoga or any fitness activity. Additionally, for doing this, the person has to be punctual about edible. Secondly, due to heavy workload and western influence, people prefer convenience or junk food which is unhealthythat is unhygienic and not good for health. For example, in the USA, 72% of citizens like to eat outside instead of homemade food because of limited timefor time availability which causes many health problemswhich forges many health predicaments.
Government bodiesThe bureaucrats and people’s attitudesthe psyche of people play a vital role in tackling this adversity. The authorities shouldThe authority should have to raise awareness of healthy lifestylespromote or spread awareness for being healthy and fit in the community. For instance, the employee has to prefer to walk and give more preference to climbing stairs over an elevator, and walking is full cardiovascular. Another solution is that people need to understand the disadvantagespeople have to understand the cons of unhealthy foodnourishment and prioritize nutritious homemade foodhomemade protein food. For example, international learners who go to foreign countries for education pay more money for healthy food than unhealthy foodundigested edible.
In conclusion, although unhealthy diet and lack of fitness activities are seen nowadays because of limited free timeless time availability or vocal time and western culture. In my view, the authorities need to raise people’s awarenessthe authority has to be aware of people, and changes in people’s mindsets can tackle this problem more effectivelypeople’s mindset tackles this problem more precisely.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response addresses both causes and solutions and is organised into clear topic-based paragraphs, with the causes paragraph offering the strongest development. However, frequent inaccurate word choices and grammatical errors make several explanations and examples difficult to follow, while some support is implausible or insufficiently connected. Prioritise clear, precise sentences and develop each proposed solution with a directly relevant explanation or realistic example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both parts of the task are addressed with relevant causes and solutions, but several ideas and examples are insufficiently developed or unclear.
Explain how each solution would change behaviour and support it with a realistic, directly relevant example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph structure gives the essay a broadly clear progression, although some links within sentences are mechanical or difficult to follow.
Use simpler referencing and linking so that every supporting sentence has an explicit logical connection to its main idea.
Lexical Resource
There is a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices sometimes obscure the intended meaning.
Prefer familiar, precise expressions such as healthy food and busy schedules instead of forcing unusual synonyms like edible or tribulation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures is attempted, but frequent errors in sentence formation, agreement, articles, and word forms reduce clarity.
Build complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, then check agreement and article use before adding complex clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays, many people have an unhealthy diet and do not exercise regularly. What are the reasons behind this trend? How can we encourage these people to live healthy lifestyles?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.