The diagram shows the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.

Same questionCompare 7 different answers (Band 6–8)

Sample Response

1

The diagram illustrates how West Park Secondary School changedhas transformed between 1950 and 2010over a period of 60 years since its establishment in 1950. Overall, it can be seen that the school underwenthad undergone significant changessome significant changes over the period, includingthroughout the period with the addition of a science blockthe expansion of the school building, as well as the addition of a sports field and car park. As the diagram shows, in 1950, the school had a school building immediately to the right ofone building just right next to a row of housessome houses. There was also a playground immediately south of the schoolimmediately behind the school and farmland located southwest of itsouth-west to it. By 1980After 30 years, the houses were demolished to build a car park. Moreover, the building was expanded into two parts, one called science block and the other was used as the main building. Another noteworthy change that happened was the conversion of the farmland into a sports fieldconversion of farmland to the sports field. By 2010Looking at the school in 2010, the most prominent changeonly marked change that occurred was the extension of the car park that occupied almost half of the total area of the school. As a result, the size of the sports field and the playground were reducedhad to be shrunken to make way for the enlargement of the car park.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response selects the major stages accurately and presents the site’s development in a clear chronological sequence, supported by flexible language. Its main limitation is precision: the science block is described as part of an expanded school building rather than as development on the former housing area, while some grammatical and collocational slips reduce polish. Clarify spatial relationships directly from each map and use consistently natural forms when describing change.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

7.5
Scoring rule

The overview and chronological details cover the main changes accurately, though the relationship between the former houses and the new science block is not stated precisely.

Next step

Describe the science block as replacing part of the housing area and distinguish clearly between additions, unchanged features, and reduced spaces.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0
Scoring rule

The report follows the three dates in a clear, logical sequence, but the single-paragraph presentation makes the overview and details less distinct.

Next step

Separate the overview from the chronological detail and use one detail paragraph for 1950–1980 and another for 1980–2010.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.0
Scoring rule

Vocabulary for spatial and structural change is varied and generally precise, with occasional awkward choices such as “south-west to it” and “had to be shrunken.”

Next step

Prefer natural map-report phrases such as “to the south-west,” “was reduced in size,” and “was converted into.”

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0
Scoring rule

The response uses varied complex structures with generally good control, although tense, article, and complement errors occur in several sentences.

Next step

Maintain consistent past-tense narration and revise forms such as “next to,” “a science block,” and “were reduced” for greater accuracy.

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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1

The diagram shows the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.

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