You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In your letter: - describe the situation - explain your problems and why it is difficult to work - say what kind of accommodation you would prefer
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to bring to your attention about the problems I am facing with my shared accommodation. I am a research student living along with a roommate who is an enthusiastic pianist and who seems to be quite famous, as a lot of people frequently come and visit him, to learn from him. I am troubled by the noises they make and it is becoming hard for me to concentrate on my research and work. I am not against musicians, but I simply prefer to have my own privacy. In addition to this, we both have a shared washroom. Since we both have to leave for our respective works at the same time, it is sometimes hard for both of us to get the washroom unoccupied. I am a person who prefer to live a life of solitude. So, I would really appreciate if you can provide me a single room with attached washroom to it. Hope you will consider my request. Yours Sincerely, Suresh Panduga.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove incorrect preposition Original: attention about Suggested revision: attention Why it matters: Bring something to someone's attention does not take about after attention.
- 2. Use uncountable noun Original: noises Suggested revision: noise Why it matters: Noise is normally uncountable when referring generally to disturbing sound.
- 3. Use natural work phrase Original: our respective works Suggested revision: work Why it matters: Work is uncountable when referring generally to each person's job or duties.
- 4. Use natural collocation Original: get the washroom unoccupied Suggested revision: find the washroom available Why it matters: Find the washroom available expresses the intended meaning naturally and clearly.
- 5. Fix subject agreement Original: prefer Suggested revision: prefers Why it matters: The singular relative subject who requires the verb prefers.
- 6. Add object pronoun Original: would really appreciate if Suggested revision: would really appreciate it if Why it matters: Appreciate requires the anticipatory object it before an if-clause.
- 7. Fix noun phrase Original: with attached washroom to it Suggested revision: with an attached washroom Why it matters: The revised noun phrase needs an article and removes the redundant ending.
- 8. Add sentence subject Original: Hope you will consider Suggested revision: I hope you will consider Why it matters: A formal complete sentence needs the explicit subject I.
- 9. Correct sign-off case Original: Sincerely Suggested revision: sincerely Why it matters: The second word of this conventional sign-off should not be capitalized.
- 10. Use formal collocation Original: facing Suggested revision: experiencing Why it matters: Experiencing is more natural and formal when describing ongoing accommodation problems.
- 11. Use formal adjective Original: hard Suggested revision: difficult Why it matters: Difficult maintains a more formal register for a letter to an accommodation officer.
- 12. Remove redundant wording Original: research and work Suggested revision: research work Why it matters: Research work expresses the activity clearly without an unnecessary coordination.
Suggested Rewrites
- attention about attention
- noises noise
- our respective works work
- get the washroom unoccupied find the washroom available
- prefer prefers
- would really appreciate if would really appreciate it if
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter covers every requested point, gives concrete reasons why the shared room disrupts study, and makes the preferred solution clear in a suitably respectful tone. Its main limitation is recurring awkward phrasing and grammatical control in otherwise ambitious sentences; the highest-priority improvement is to revise collocations and agreement so the request sounds consistently natural and professional.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The situation, its effects on work, and the desired single room with a private washroom are all clearly explained in an appropriate formal register.
Make the request more actionable by stating when the room change is needed and asking about the next administrative step.
Coherence and Cohesion
The letter follows a clear sequence from the noisy roommate to the shared-washroom problem and then the accommodation request.
Divide the response into purpose, problem, and request paragraphs so each stage of the message is more distinct.
Lexical Resource
There is enough range to describe the accommodation problems precisely, although several collocations sound unnatural or overformal.
Replace phrases such as "bring to your attention about" and "get the washroom unoccupied" with concise, idiomatic alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The writer uses several complex structures successfully, but agreement, article, and conditional errors recur across the letter.
Proofread subject-verb agreement and polite request forms, especially "a person who prefers" and "I would appreciate it if you could."
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In your letter:
- describe the situation
- explain your problems and why it is difficult to work
- say what kind of accommodation you would prefer
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.