Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Today’s children become tomorrow’s citizens. So allowing them to interact with the community is very important. More than that every human is a social being. Schools play an important role in forming children’s social behaviours. So, in my opinion, teaching children at school is better than teaching at home.
The main reason why kids need to be sent to school is to get awareness about the society he/she will be a part of the future. Till 4-5 years, children normally with their family. Only after sending to school they will get a chance to mingle with the same age group. This will help them to improve communication skills, social awareness, skills to handle difficult situations etc. They will be able to do at least their own things themselves. Also, I think this is required to reduce their selfishness- they will learn how to share in schools.
The other important fact is discipline. At home, kids always feel easiness. It will be always a tension free atmosphere for them since they are used to it from the childhood. Also, parents and other family members may not be as strict as a teacher in many aspects. So it is hard to get discipline in life for kids those who miss schooling. The main reason for this is the freedom they get at home.
Apart from all these disadvantages, learning at home has some merits too. The main advantage is kids will be more comfortable. Parents can decide or prioritise the topics to teach, unlike in some schools give over work-load to kids. The time for study can be flexible so that children will get more free time. And parents may be comparatively tension free too.
In a nutshell, even though both methods have its own merits and demerits, parents should make important decisions about their children according to their circumstances and convenience.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use formal result link Original: So allowing Suggested revision: Therefore, allowing Why it matters: “Therefore” links the claim to the previous sentence more formally and clearly.
- 2. Fix addition transition Original: More than that every human Suggested revision: Moreover, every human Why it matters: The conjunctive adverb correctly introduces an additional point and supplies the needed punctuation.
- 3. Use social-skills phrase Original: forming children’s social behaviours Suggested revision: developing children’s social skills Why it matters: Schools develop social skills; “forming social behaviours” is unnatural and imprecise.
- 4. Fix inversion structure Original: Only after sending to school they will get Suggested revision: Only after being sent to school will they get Why it matters: An initial restrictive phrase requires subject-auxiliary inversion and a passive gerund.
- 5. Clarify peer interaction Original: mingle with the same age group Suggested revision: interact with children of the same age Why it matters: The replacement identifies the peers directly and uses a more formal verb.
- 6. Use concise verb pattern Original: help them to improve Suggested revision: help them improve Why it matters: “Help” can take the object followed directly by the base verb.
- 7. Complete skills phrase Original: skills to handle difficult situations etc. Suggested revision: skills for handling difficult situations Why it matters: “Skills for” takes a gerund, and the vague abbreviation is unnecessary at the end of the list.
- 8. Clarify independence Original: do at least their own things themselves Suggested revision: manage basic tasks independently Why it matters: The revision expresses practical independence clearly without repetition.
- 9. Link cause clearly Original: selfishness- they Suggested revision: selfishness because they Why it matters: The conjunction states how learning to share supports the preceding claim.
- 10. Name contributing factor Original: The other important fact Suggested revision: Another important factor Why it matters: Discipline is presented as an additional factor, not a factual statement.
- 11. Fix ease collocation Original: feel easiness Suggested revision: feel at ease Why it matters: “Feel at ease” is the standard expression for being comfortable.
- 12. Place frequency adverb Original: It will be always Suggested revision: It will always be Why it matters: The frequency adverb belongs between the modal auxiliary and the main verb.
Suggested Rewrites
- So allowing Therefore, allowing
- More than that every human Moreover, every human
- forming children’s social behaviours developing children’s social skills
- Only after sending to school they will get Only after being sent to school will they get
- mingle with the same age group interact with children of the same age
- help them to improve help them improve
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay discusses meaningful benefits of both approaches, especially the social development and discipline associated with school, and uses a clear paragraph structure. Its main limitation is an inconsistent position: school is preferred initially, while the conclusion leaves the choice entirely to parental circumstances. Prioritise one stable opinion and compare the strongest school benefit directly with the flexibility offered by home education.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Relevant advantages of school and home education are discussed, but the home side is less developed and the final opinion contradicts the introduction.
Maintain one clear position throughout and explain why the chosen method's main developmental benefit outweighs the alternative's advantages.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are divided into logical paragraphs on socialisation, discipline, home learning, and the conclusion, though some links are imprecise.
Use explicit topic sentences naming each advantage and make the concluding comparison follow directly from the body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is sufficient for education and child development, but frequent unnatural expressions reduce precision and formality.
Replace phrases such as 'get awareness', 'feel easiness', 'tension free', and 'over work-load' with natural academic language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of sentence types is attempted, but missing verbs, agreement errors, article problems, and faulty relative clauses recur.
Check that every clause has a complete verb and revise structures such as 'children normally live with their family' and 'children who miss school'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.