Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university?
Sample Response
It is believed that a university has the role to educate students and prepare them for the future. Each individual allows to pursuit their right to learn several of subjects relying on their goals. However, it is argued that the most important function of a college or university is to prepare learners for the job. In my view, a university should regard people eagerness in term of their future work. That is why the most valuable thing for a university is to create an environment for giving space for learners to develop their skills for their future job.
University has to spread awareness that becoming competent in school can affect students’ performance at workplaces. Even though the essential of learning in university is to pass exams, learners should realise that the real exam is after their completion of the study. They will experience how to combat with others for getting a decent job. Therefore, people who prepare earlier will gain more benefits. Based on this case, a university has the responsibility to create competitive circumstance such as in a workplace. Again, preparing students for the future brings some challenges that the university has to accept. Such challenges involved more practical education rather than being confined to theoretical lessons. It is inevitable that practical lessons are more important and effective than the theory we learn in university.
Another reason is the best way to develop someone’s skill is by creating space for learners in term of their interest. Nonetheless, this is the main problem that learners face when they enter in higher education - they will lose their passion due to school curriculum which deters them to get involved in further on non-academic activities. As the result, university tends to limit students community to express and show their skill.
In conclusion, a university should understand that preparing students for workplaces is an indispensable part in this era. University may start by setting the lecture class such workplace environment for the case and providing beneficial programmes to enhance students’ skill as an individual or group.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Verb pattern Original: Each individual allows to pursuit Suggested revision: Each individual should be allowed to pursue Why it matters: Allowed needs a passive form here, and pursue is the correct verb.
- 2. Noun phrase Original: several of subjects Suggested revision: several subjects Why it matters: The phrase does not need of.
- 3. Wrong preposition Original: relying on their goals Suggested revision: depending on their goals Why it matters: Depending on is the natural phrase here.
- 4. Possessive form Original: people eagerness Suggested revision: students' eagerness Why it matters: The noun phrase needs a possessive and students is more specific.
- 5. Fixed phrase Original: in term of their future work Suggested revision: in terms of their future work Why it matters: The correct phrase is in terms of.
- 6. Academic transition Original: That is why the most valuable thing Suggested revision: Therefore, the most valuable function Why it matters: This links the argument more formally.
- 7. Article use Original: University has to spread awareness Suggested revision: A university has to spread awareness Why it matters: A singular countable noun needs an article.
- 8. Wrong noun form Original: the essential of learning Suggested revision: the purpose of learning Why it matters: Purpose is the intended noun here.
- 9. Natural phrasing Original: after their completion of the study Suggested revision: after they complete their studies Why it matters: This is clearer and grammatically smoother.
- 10. Wrong collocation Original: combat with others Suggested revision: compete with others Why it matters: Compete is the correct verb for job competition.
- 11. Natural phrase Original: competitive circumstance Suggested revision: a competitive environment Why it matters: This is the standard collocation.
- 12. Verb tense Original: Such challenges involved Suggested revision: Such challenges involve Why it matters: Use present simple for a general statement.
Suggested Rewrites
- Each individual allows to pursuit Each individual should be allowed to pursue
- several of subjects several subjects
- relying on their goals depending on their goals
- people eagerness students' eagerness
- in term of their future work in terms of their future work
- That is why the most valuable thing Therefore, the most valuable function
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The essay presents a clear view that universities should mainly prepare students for work and gives relevant reasons about practical education and skill development. It only briefly acknowledges the alternative view of knowledge for its own sake, so the answer is somewhat one-sided.
Add a short concession explaining why pure knowledge still matters, then show why employability should remain the main function.
Coherence and Cohesion
There is a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and conclusion, but progression is sometimes hard to follow because several sentences contain abstract or repeated ideas. Some links between curriculum, passion, and workplace preparation need clearer sequencing.
Start each body paragraph with one controlling idea, then use examples before moving to the next point.
Lexical Resource
The essay uses relevant education and workplace vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate word choices and collocations reduce clarity, such as pursuit their right, competitive circumstance, and school curriculum.
Use natural academic phrases such as pursue their interests, workplace-like environment, practical training, and extracurricular activities.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Grammar errors are frequent in verb forms, articles, noun phrases, and prepositions. Meaning remains mostly understandable, but accuracy is below the strength of the ideas.
Revise every sentence for subject-verb agreement and prepositions after verbs such as prepare, depend, enter, and involve.