The picture below shows the museum’s plant in 1998 and after some changes were made in 2008.
Sample Response
The diagrams display a museum layout in 1998 and its redesigned layout in 2008compared to new construction in 2008 after some renovations.
Overall, it is immediately apparent that there werethere have been a number of changes in the 2008 layout, including the restaurant, café, garden, and shopranging from the restaurants, cafes, garden, shops and so on.
To begin with, in 1998, there was no restaurant in the northwesternnortheastern corner of the museum; however, in the 2008 layoutthe new layout in 2008, a restaurant was introducedthere was an introduction of a restaurant, along withwith an addition of a temporary exhibition room which had previously been locatedwhich used to be located inat the southwestern part of the 1998 plan. The 2008 plan created a shop and a place to keep bags and coats in the southwest part of the museum.
Turning to the central areaAgain, in the centre of the 1998 layout was a garden. However, in the 2008 layoutHowever, in constructing the 2008 museum, the garden now occupies a smaller central areathe central part now occupies a garden, fountains and a café seating areacafe sitting area. The permanent exhibition roomsroom and the ticket entrance and exitthe ticket entrance remain unchanged in both layouts.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response is clearly structured and uses a reasonable range of language to describe several changes, including the new restaurant and the revised central garden. However, the overview is too general, the restaurant is placed in the wrong corner, and the account overlooks the major conversion of the western permanent exhibition area. Prioritise an accurate overview of the largest changes, then group and compare relocations systematically.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response identifies several relevant changes, but its overview is vague and important map features are omitted or inaccurately located.
Highlight the conversion of the western exhibition space and accurately compare the relocated facilities, including the cafe, shop, cloakroom and toilets.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph structure is easy to follow, although the grouping of changes is incomplete and links such as 'Again' are mechanical.
Organise the details by museum area or by unchanged, relocated and newly added facilities so comparisons progress more systematically.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to describe renovation and location, but awkward choices such as 'new construction' and 'the plan created' reduce precision.
Use precise map language such as 'was converted into', 'was relocated to' and 'remained in the same position'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures is generally controlled, despite some cumbersome constructions and imprecise clause attachment.
Replace long noun-heavy phrases with direct active or passive clauses and check that each relative clause clearly modifies the intended facility.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The picture below shows the museum’s plant in 1998 and after some changes were made in 2008.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.