The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.
Sample Response
The maps illustrate the overall development of Grange Parkpark on Arnold Avenuein Arnold avenue at two points in timestaged in two different periods —- the first one depicts the park when it openedduring its inauguration in 1920, and the latter portrays its present-day layout.
Generally speaking, the overall layout of the park has changed drasticallyhas been changed drastically while the two main entrances have remainedexcept for the main entrances at Arnold avenue and Eldon Street.
The park first opened in 1920, and it has undergone extensive redevelopment since thenit went through drastic developments since then. To begin with, the key feature of the park—the central fountain—park- the central fountain, was removedhas been demolished. The rose gardens were previously locatedThe rose garden was earlier scattered around the periphery of the park along with the seating arrangements, but now it has been relocatedremobilised to the centre of the park. Meanwhile, the stage for the musicians has been further converted to an amphitheatre"Amphitheatre" for concerts to accommodate a larger crowd. However, the rose garden inon the northwest has been retained.
Besides, the glasshouse on the southeast side has been redesigned with a water feature and an underground entrance to the car park for visitors. The addition of amenities such as the cafe on the northeast side adjacent to Arnold avenue was also done. Finally, the pond of water plants was redesigned to accommodate a children’s play area.
[Writteb by - Ananya]
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response gives a clear overview and covers nearly all major changes, with especially effective attention to the park’s retained entrances and transformed facilities. Its main weakness is imprecise wording that occasionally misrepresents replacement as redesign and makes some descriptions sound unnatural. Prioritise exact map language, such as ‘replaced by’ and ‘converted into’, while grouping the western, central, and eastern changes more systematically.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and comprehensive coverage identify the major retained, removed, relocated, and added features, although a few replacements are described imprecisely.
Distinguish exact replacements from redesigns and state more precisely that the southeastern glasshouse gave way to a water feature and nearby underground-car-park access.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses clearly from an overview to broadly grouped changes, with effective referencing and linking despite some repetition.
Organise the details more deliberately by western, central, and eastern areas, avoiding repeated statements about the scale of development.
Lexical Resource
A good range of map-description vocabulary conveys the changes, but choices such as ‘staged’, ‘remobilised’, and ‘redesigned with’ are awkward or inaccurate.
Prefer precise natural collocations such as ‘shown at two points in time’, ‘relocated’, ‘replaced by’, and ‘converted into’.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex structures are generally well controlled, though agreement, article, punctuation, and construction errors occur occasionally.
Check noun agreement and sentence boundaries, especially in phrases such as ‘the rose gardens were scattered’ and the appositive around ‘the central fountain’.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.