The chart below shows the sleep patterns of people in five different occupations according to a Canadian study.
Sample Response
The provided data showshows the sleep patternsthe sleeping pattern of people inof different occupations based on a Canadian study. OverallAs is observed from the given information, the timing and total hours of sleep varythe timing and total hours of sleeping varies based on the occupational group.occupation group of people
Firstly, students sleep 8 hours a day and their average usual sleeping hours run fromsleeping hours are from 11:00 pm to 7:00 am. Secondly, truckTruck drivers sleep at different times of the daysleep on different times of a day possibly because of the nature of their worktheir job nature and variations in driving schedulesvariation of driving schedules and they sleep around 6 hours a day. By contrast, full-time mothersAgain, full-time mothers begin sleeping at 10 p.m.sleep from 10 pm and with intermittent waking periodswith some intervals they also have a varied sleep patternshow a variation on sleeping times and in total they sleep 8 hours a day. Business executives sleep 6 hours a day but they have a consistent sleep pattern similar to that of the studentsconsistent sleeping pattern like the students and they sleep from 11.00 pm to 5:00 am on averageon an average. Finally, the doctors sleep fewer hours than people in the other occupationspeople from other occupation. They sleep from 1:00 a.m. to 7:00 a.m. with an interval of one hour.
In summary, the sleeping patterns vary based on the occupation of the people and students and full-time mothersstudents & full-time mothers sleep more hours in a day while doctors sleep comparatively less among the different categories of people.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response has a clear occupation-by-occupation structure and communicates its comparisons in generally appropriate language. However, the supplied visual identifies the occupations and hourly periods without showing asleep or awake entries, so the claimed schedules and totals cannot be verified and the explanation of drivers' job conditions is speculative; prioritise reporting only features explicitly supported by visible chart markings.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response provides an overview and addresses every occupation, but its detailed sleep times and totals are unsupported by the visible chart and it adds speculation about truck drivers.
Base each stated duration and comparison on clearly visible asleep or awake markings, and omit causal explanations that the chart does not provide.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction, detailed comparison, and summary form a clear progression, although the long central paragraph relies on mechanical sequencing and repetition.
Group occupations by shared sleep patterns or totals and use fewer enumerative transitions to create more meaningful comparison.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is sufficient for the task and includes some appropriate comparative language, but awkward collocations and repeated forms reduce precision.
Use natural expressions such as 'sleep at different times', 'people in each occupation', and 'on average' while varying repeated uses of 'sleep'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentences conveys meaning, but agreement, article, preposition, punctuation, and sentence-boundary errors recur.
Proofread subject-verb agreement and divide the long sentences joined repeatedly with 'and' into accurately punctuated clauses.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the sleep patterns of people in five different occupations according to a Canadian study.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.