In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries, they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?
Sample Response
In thethis modern world whether children should follow strict ruleswhether strict rules should be followed by children or not is a very critical and controversial issue. SinceAs we know that children are living in different societies and cultures, their behaviour and mental developmentmetal structures are different as well. For example, in Pakistan, greater sociability and loyaltymore social and loyalty could be observed among children and they respect their parents with great respectin a very charming way. While respect is very common, friendly relationships between parents and children are notfriendly relationship among parents and children are not. On the contrary, in European countries, it is a bit different. In these countries, children have their own goalsmotto and they do those types of tasks thattasks only which they have set in their minds. However, they have a better and friendly relationship with their parents. So overall strict rules would not be suitable for all geographic locations, which might be helpful in some parts of the world. Strict rules governing children's behaviourThe strict rules in children behaviour have some advantages but also have some drawbacks which are discussed below.
First of all, childrenFirst of all the children under strict rules and code of conduct will be responsible and very respectful to the parents, olderelder people and to the society. Such children build a stable and attractive society. Children in such a societyThe children in such society feel themselveshimself a responsible citizen, mature, and know how to treat others in the society in a respectful way. And the society of such children is free of heinous crimes and drug abuses. On the other hand, children who do not follow strict rules of behaviour become rude, selfish and undisciplined. And such children create hurdles in the society which have a negative impact on societycreate bad impacts on a society. And for such children, the government also triestry to develop such a law to address such harmful behaviourdemolish such bad elements from the society.
Strict rules for children often have very bad psychological and social problems. It is not unusual that parents who beatbit their children would be hated and not respected by the children at a later stage. Strict rules hinder the creativity among children and make them under-developed mentally. A friendly relationship between parents and kids is often helpful for a better future generation. Strict rules are temporary but love and respects are long lasting. Hence parents should try to be friendly with kids and try to explain the right from wrongs. In many society children’s rude and unexpected behaviour are rooted to the too much strict regulation they were imposed. Hence, a set ofif strict rules is not always a better option to nurture kids.
It is concluded from this topic that Children under strict rule behaviour have a good moral character and responsible adults but sometimes this is not a good option and have negative impacts. So I would opine that friendly relationship, some freedom as well as some rigid rules should be combined to nurture the children and for their betterment.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response presents a clear, balanced conclusion and develops both the benefits and risks of strict rules across a logical essay structure. Its main limitation is that several claims are broad, culturally stereotyped, or only loosely explained, while frequent grammatical and collocational errors sometimes make the argument awkward. The highest priority is to support a focused position with precise, realistic examples and revise sentences for agreement, article use, and natural word combinations.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the question, considers advantages and disadvantages, and reaches a clear qualified position, although several supporting claims are overgeneralized or insufficiently explained.
State the intended degree of rule-following earlier and develop each main reason with a specific, credible explanation or example.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress through a recognizable introduction, contrasting body paragraphs, and conclusion, but the long opening and mechanical linking weaken cohesion.
Shorten the contextual opening and connect sentences through logical reference rather than repeatedly beginning them with coordinating linkers.
Lexical Resource
The essay uses a sufficient range of topic vocabulary, including some less common items, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices reduce precision.
Replace unnatural combinations with precise expressions, especially when describing children's development, social effects, and parental discipline.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mixture of simple and complex structures conveys the main meaning, though errors in agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence construction occur frequently.
Proofread each sentence for subject-verb agreement and noun form, then rewrite awkward complex clauses into accurately controlled structures.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries, they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.