What are the possible effects of living long on an individual and on the whole society? Give some examples for and against according to your knowledge.
Sample Response
AdvancesAdvancement in medical technology, better knowledge ofabout medical science, and the discovery of curesthe invention of the cure for deadly diseases have greatly contributed to increased life expectancy these days. Both individuals and society haveBoth the individual and the society have been affected by this achievement. This essay delves into the positive and negative aspects of 'longer living' on individuals and societyon individual and the society with relevant examples.
Undeniably, death is a terrific affair to all the human and each and every individual denies to accept this inevitable event. Therefore, for an individualTherefore as an individual, increased life expectancy is beneficial becausea benefit that they can live longer and enjoy their time on Earth. In addition, longevitylong living is a positive contributor to the developmentpositive trend towards the development of a country. For instance, increased life expectancy contributes more to more workforces to a country and in turn, raises the productivity of the nation. Professionals like doctors, researchers, writers, political leaders and many othersand much more can contribute to the country even more in old agein their old ages drawing on their extensive life experiencewith their immense experience in life.
In contrast, increased human lifespan has some drawbacks as wellsome drawbacks also. Firstly, it will raiseworsen the unemployment rate in an overpopulated country like India. Moreover, increased life expectancy might proportionally increase the dependency ratiothe dependents’ rate. For instance, it will cause a higher number of retired peoplean elevated number of retired people and in turn, this could place a burdenit will be a burden to the family and society, no matter how cruel it might sound. Furthermore, society needs more funds for the medical and recreational facilities for the older generation. Finally, life in old ageages is fragile and people become more susceptible to diseasediseases attack easily and make an individual’s life miserable. For some people, a short and healthy life is more desirable than a long and suffering life. Hence increased life expectancy has some adverse effects on both the individual and the society.
Putting everything into consideration, the longer life is a positive development for the individual and the nation in terms of our desire to live long with others and to contribute to the country, whereas it will cause unemployment, dependency and suffering as wellsufferings also.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response’s strongest feature is its balanced coverage of benefits and drawbacks for both individuals and society, supported by a clear overall position and relevant examples. Its main limitation is that several claims remain broad or only briefly explained, while frequent unnatural word combinations and grammatical slips reduce precision. The priority is to develop fewer effects more convincingly and express them through accurate, natural sentence patterns.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses effects on both individuals and society, presents a clear view, and supports its main points with relevant examples.
Develop the causal reasoning behind key claims, especially the links between longevity, employment, productivity, and dependency.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through positive and negative effects, with clear paragraphing and generally effective signposting.
Make connections within paragraphs less mechanical by using clearer logical links between each claim and its explanation.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a reasonably broad topic vocabulary, but recurring awkward collocations and word-form choices weaken precision.
Replace expressions such as “long living” and “old ages” with natural collocations and check noun forms and countability.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the argument clearly despite recurring errors with articles, agreement, plurals, and complements.
Proofread systematically for article use, singular-plural agreement, and verb patterns such as “refuse to accept.”
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IELTS Writing Task 2
What are the possible effects of living long on an individual and on the whole society? Give some examples for and against according to your knowledge.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.