Some believe that global warming is the most pressing environmental problem which we have at the moment; others believe that deforestation has a more devastating impact on our world. To what extent you agree or disagree with the statement?
Sample Response
Ever since the dawn of industrialisation, the world’s environmentworld’s environment has been changing drasticallyin a drastic manner. Many of these changes are negative in natureof negative nature. Some argue that global warming is the most serious environmental issue that we deal with, while others contend that deforestation hasothers contend deforestation has a much more damaging impact on Earth’s environmentthe earth’s environment. Both sides of this debate will be analysed in this essay before a reasoned conclusion is drawn.
On the one hand, global warming has raised the average temperature of the Earth by several degrees over the last few centuries, which has numerous negative consequencesa myriad of negative ramifications for the inhabitants of the planet Earthearth. For example, the continuous risecontinual rising of sea levels has put cities such as London in the UK and Rotterdam in the NetherlandsLondon, UK and Rotterdam, Netherlands at risk of being floodedon the brink of being drowned by deluges. As a result, governments have to devise new measures to keep such disasters from wiping out these cities entirely. Hence, it is argued that global warming is the most serious problem facing our planetproblem our planet encounters.
On the other hand, many believe that, of all the ecological problems,many believe out of all the ecological problems, deforestation leaves the largest environmental footprint on Earth. For instance, each year thousands of trees are cut downare being cut down in China to fuel the furnaces in industries to support itstheir economy, which in turn has disrupted the carbon dioxide balancedisturbed the balance of carbon dioxide in the environment. Since carbon dioxide is a toxic gas, respiratory problemsthe respiratory problems in China have reached alarming levelsan exorbitant level in recent decadesin the recent decades. When looking at the discussion in this light, the devastating effects of deforestation are obvious.
Since both sides of this argument have valid pointsindisputable virtues, it is impossible to say that one issue leads to more problems than the other. Thus, it is hoped that both the individuals and governments will take meaningfulnoticeable steps to counter the rising ecological hardships this worldhardships, this world is facing.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is strongest in its clear four-paragraph progression and its willingness to compare the consequences of both environmental problems before reaching a definite, qualified conclusion. Its main limitation is that several supporting claims are scientifically questionable or insufficiently precise, which weakens the argument despite its relevance. Prioritise accurate causal explanations and revise awkward collocations and article use.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both environmental problems are addressed, supported with examples, and brought together in a clear conclusion that neither can be ranked decisively.
Use factually sound evidence and explain more precisely how each example demonstrates the relative severity of the two problems.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear overall sequence and each body paragraph develops one side, although some linking is formulaic.
Replace mechanical signposting and repeated mini-conclusions with smoother logical connections between claims, evidence, and comparison.
Lexical Resource
The response demonstrates a good range of environmental vocabulary, but several word choices and collocations are unnatural or imprecise.
Use more accurate phrasing for ideas currently expressed as “negative nature,” “drowned by deluges,” and “exorbitant level.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are attempted successfully and meaning remains clear, but article, modifier, and punctuation errors recur.
Review articles and sentence boundaries, particularly in phrases such as “world’s environment,” “the recent decades,” and the final comma splice.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some believe that global warming is the most pressing environmental problem which we have at the moment; others believe that deforestation has a more devastating impact on our world. To what extent you agree or disagree with the statement?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.