In some countries, it can be difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
Sample Response
It is certainly true that these days due to the advances in technologyadvancements in the field of science and technology, most employers choose to employ fresh graduatesmost of the employers opt the fresh graduates to employ. However, older people often have resilienceaged people obviously have guts and accomplishments to climb the corporate ladderclimb the ladder of corporate hierarchy. It is high time employers consideredIt is high time, one must think of the experience and the positive outlook older peoplethe elder people have towards any aspect. Nevertheless, there are apparent ways to solve it.
To begin with, the main reasons could be the age factor, productivity, lower productivitylowered work output, a way of thinking and mostly people over the age of 50 are usually less familiar with new technologyLuddites. Today, all tasks primarily are being accomplished by using technology. Moreover, as older people may not always be tech-savvythe aged person generally may not be tech-savvy, this might be one possible reason for not recruiting them in good jobs. Furthermore, as a person becomes old, one would suffer from health implications which hinder productivity in the workplacehinder the productivity at workplace. Nevertheless, it is undeniable fact that, some older people willingly do not want to work; they might want to spend their rest of the retired life with their children and grandchildren. Taking into considerations all the points it is clear why people over the age of 50 generally are not recruited in good jobs despite their experience.
On the other hand, according to me, how much ever the technology develops, experience always stands ahead of the knowledge of novices. Hence, certain measures should be taken to address this moot issue. What I suggest is that the government can playpay a crucial role by allotting employment allowances to the elder people. Next, the corporate companies perhaps, think to form an expert team comprising older peoplecomprising of aged people who could guide the younger employees to ensure the success of an organisation.
To summarise, I believe that, there are several reasons behind this controversial issue and the possible consequences, but, by excluding these, the elder people should be given respect and a chance to prove their talent and experience.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response addresses both causes and possible measures and is generally easy to follow, with relevant discussion of technology, health, government support, and advisory roles for experienced workers. Its main limitation is that some causes are stereotyped or loosely organised, while proposed measures do not always answer the identified barriers directly. Prioritise a cause-and-solution structure that links employer bias and skills gaps to targeted retraining and fairer recruitment.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay addresses both causes and measures, with relevant ideas about technology, productivity, health, government support, and advisory roles. Some causes are stereotyped and one solution is not clearly linked to getting good jobs.
Focus on employer bias, skills mismatch, and retraining, then match each solution directly to a cause.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is clearly paragraphed and generally easy to follow. However, paragraph two lists several causes without enough hierarchy, and the final paragraph refers to consequences rather than solutions.
Use one body paragraph for causes and one for solutions, with clear topic sentences and fewer side comments.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate and sometimes ambitious, but several word choices are inaccurate or too informal for the topic. Collocations around employment and older workers need more control.
Use neutral employment language such as older workers, employers, retraining, workplace productivity, and age discrimination.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses a range of sentence types, but errors with articles, verb patterns, commas, and noun forms occur regularly. Meaning remains mostly clear.
Check each sentence for correct verb patterns after opt, help, pay, and comprise.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
In some countries, it can be difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.