The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from Brighton University in 2019 entering different employment sectors.

Sample Response

1

The pie chart illustrates the career choices of Brighton University's 2019 graduates, giving the percentages who worked in each of various sectors after finishing university. Overwhelmingly, industry and government were the most popular choices. Just under half the students went into industry, with service industries attracting more Brighton graduates than any other sector by far — almost a third (33.0%). About half that number (16.3%) took jobs in manufacturing. Politics and public service were the next most popular choiceschoice, together accounting for 17.7% of graduatesaccounting for nearly a fifth of graduates. Just over 12% went into politics and a further 5.6% chose the civil service. The other significant career choices were education (about 15%) and two others: transportation and warehousing, with 7.8%; and science and technology with 7.3%. The least popular choices were charity and sportincluded work in the charitable sector and careers in sport, chosen by 0.3% and 0.1% of graduates, respectivelyboth of which were chosen by well under 1% of graduates. Finally, 2.8% entered work in other unspecified sectorsother, unspecified, sectors.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 8.0

The response gives a highly complete and accurate account of the chart, grouping related sectors effectively and supporting the main comparisons with precise percentages. Its main limitation is presentation in a single dense paragraph, together with a small agreement lapse in the description of the next most popular choice. Prioritise clearer paragraphing while retaining the report’s strong selection, precision, and concise comparative style.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

8.5
Scoring rule

The report accurately identifies the dominant and least popular sectors and covers virtually all categories with well-selected figures.

Next step

Make the overview even more direct by naming service industries as the largest individual sector before grouping broader employment areas.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.5
Scoring rule

The categories are ordered and grouped coherently, but the entire report is presented as one dense paragraph.

Next step

Use a distinct overview and two detail paragraphs organised around larger and smaller employment shares.

LR

Lexical Resource

8.0
Scoring rule

The report uses a broad, precise range of vocabulary for proportions, ranking, and sector groupings with strong control.

Next step

Refine the occasional awkward phrase, such as each of various sectors, to keep the wording consistently natural.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

8.0
Scoring rule

Complex comparative structures and punctuation are handled with strong accuracy apart from a minor agreement lapse and slight awkwardness.

Next step

Check agreement in phrases such as the next most popular choice and streamline the sentence listing education and the two smaller sectors.

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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1

The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from Brighton University in 2019 entering different employment sectors.

Your response

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20:00

Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.