The diagram below shows one way of manufacturing ceramic pots
Sample Response
The diagram shows one wayone of the possible ways to produce ceramic pots. Overall, there arethere are a total of 11 steps in the ceramic-pot production processprocess of ceramic pots production.
First, the raw materialsraw materials to make ceramic pots are dug out of the ground with an excavatorby a digging machine before being transported by trucktransported by a truck to a factory where the next 8 steps pots are followed to manufacture ceramic spots.
At the factory, the raw materials are crushed into powdercrushed into powder by a machine. In the next step, the powder is mixed with water, and the resulting mixtureand then this mixture is poured into moulds that shape the mixture into potsmoulds that form the mixture in the shape of a pot. Then, the moulded clay is driedthese moulds are dried from 4 to 6 hours before the clay pieces are assembled into potsto create assembled clay pots. Next, the clay pots are placed ininto an oven and heated to 1,000 degrees Celsiusheated at a temperature of 1000 degrees Celsius. After this initial firingOnce they are ready, they are coloured and heated in a second oven for colour firinganother oven for colour firing. The outcome of this step is the final products which are finished ceramic pots.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response follows the manufacturing sequence clearly from extraction to the finished pots, with accurate use of passive structures and relevant process vocabulary. Its main weakness is uneven language control, including one severely awkward sentence and several imprecise or repetitive phrases, while the overview mainly counts stages rather than summarizing the transformation. Improve the overview and edit each sentence for natural collocation and grammatical completeness.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main stages are accurately covered in sequence, including crushing, mixing, moulding, drying, two heating stages, and colouring, though the overview is limited to the stage count.
Summarize the overall transformation from excavated raw material to finished coloured pots and mention the two firing stages as a defining feature.
Coherence and Cohesion
The sequence is easy to follow, with logical paragraphing and clear chronological links, although the final body paragraph relies heavily on repetitive sequencing words.
Vary the linking by grouping related factory stages and using reference phrases instead of repeatedly introducing each step with "then" or "next".
Lexical Resource
Relevant process vocabulary is used effectively, but awkward collocations and repetition reduce precision, especially around production, moulding, and the final product.
Replace phrases such as "ceramic pots production" and "steps pots are followed" with natural process descriptions and proofread for slips like "ceramic spots".
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response shows a useful range of passives and complex clauses, but several malformed phrases and agreement errors interrupt otherwise clear communication.
Rewrite the transport sentence completely and check noun phrases, relative clauses, and singular-plural agreement throughout.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The diagram below shows one way of manufacturing ceramic pots
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.