The chart below shows the number of girls per 100 boys enrolled in different levels of school education.

Sample Response

1

The chart shows the number of girls per 100 boysfemale students per 100 male students in primary, secondary and tertiary education.

2

On averageAverage, more boys than girls were enrolled at these education levels in both 1990 and 1998in school both in 1990 and 1998 in both country groupsall the countries, except in tertiary education in developed countries. The number of girls per 100 boys was higherbigger in 1998 than in 1990 in the two country groups and at every education levelin all the educational stages.

3

Turning to the detailsdetail, there were more boys than girls in primary and secondary education. DeleteAs can be seen, developing countries saw a wider disparitya bigger discrepancy between girls’ and boys’ enrolment ratiosbetween the numbers of male and female students than developed countries, with the number of girls per 100 boys at 83 in 1990 and 87 in 1998 in primary education.

4

By contrast, in developed countriesHowever, in developed countries, the ratio of girls to boysthe balance of the two was much closer to the target of 100much closer to the ideal, particularly in secondary education, with 98 girls per 100 boys in 1990 and 99 in 1998.

5

Regarding tertiary education, the gender gap was even widerthe balance was even worse than in any other levellevels of education in developing countries with 66 girls enrolled for every 100 boys in 1990 and 75 in 1998. On the other hand, in developing countries, the number of girls overtook that of boys at 105 per 100 boys in 1990 and 112 in 1998.

6

This answer would probably exceed Band 7

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response provides a clear overview and uses several accurate comparisons, particularly for developing-country primary and tertiary education and developed-country secondary education. Its main weakness is uneven coverage combined with a serious category error: the 105 and 112 tertiary figures belong to developed countries, while some other groups are omitted. Correct that attribution, cover the missing categories selectively, and remove the irrelevant closing self-evaluation.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

6.5
Scoring rule

The overview accurately identifies the overall gender gap and universal increases, but coverage is incomplete and the developed-country tertiary figures are misattributed.

Next step

State that developed countries reached 105 and 112 girls in tertiary education and add the omitted developing-country secondary figures of 72 and 82.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.5
Scoring rule

The report follows a logical overview-to-detail progression by education level, but several short paragraphs and the final self-evaluation weaken unity.

Next step

Group related comparisons into fuller detail paragraphs and end after the final data comparison rather than commenting on the likely score.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.0
Scoring rule

A useful range of comparison language is used, including discrepancy, balance, and overtook, with occasional awkward collocations.

Next step

Prefer greater discrepancy and other levels of education to make comparisons more natural and precise.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0
Scoring rule

The response uses varied complex structures with generally good control, although there are occasional agreement, article, and comparison-form errors.

Next step

Edit forms such as on average, any other level, and the number was higher to improve grammatical precision.

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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1

The chart below shows the number of girls per 100 boys enrolled in different levels of school education.

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