The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010.
Sample Response
The two pie charts compare the household expenditureoutlay in a country by major categories in 1950 and 2010. Overall, in both years, significant expenditure went on housingwent on for accommodation and food which together accounted for most expenditurecovered the most of the expenditure. However, in 2010, the spending share rosespending ratio escalated for foodfor the food while it decreasedwhile decreased for the housing. In 1950, nearly two-thirds of the expenditure of people went on housingwent on for the accommodation and 11.2% on foodmore than 11% on food. The expenditure on housing plummeted in from 72.1% in 1950 to 22.0% in 20102010, 72.1% to 22.0% while it almost trebled in the case of the food. Healthcare expenditure ratio, on the contrary, was the lowest, only 2.4%, and it increased by 2.1 percentage pointsincreased by almost 2% in 2010. Similarly, the outlay on transportation was elevated in 2010 by nearly 10%. The cost ratio for education was 6.6% in 1950 which slightly decreased after six decades. Other categories accounted forOther categories attributed to only around 4% expenditure and it roughly quintupledquintuple during the period. In summary, the housing drained the highest percentages of money for the people in this country in 1950 and after 60 years it reduced while the ratio of expense on foods increased remarkably.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The report identifies the dominant expenditure patterns and describes the major shifts in housing, food, transport and other spending with generally accurate figures. Its main weakness is imprecise phrasing and an overview that misses the clearest reversal, while the closing sentence repeats rather than sharpens the comparison. Prioritise a concise overview stating that housing dominated in 1950 but food was largest in 2010, then use neutral data language throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response covers the main changes accurately: housing fell sharply from 72.1% to 22%, food rose to 34%, and other/transport increased. The overview is present, but healthcare is slightly imprecise and the final summary repeats earlier points.
State the major reversal clearly: housing dominated in 1950, while food became the largest category in 2010.
Coherence and Cohesion
The report has a clear introduction, overview and details. Some comparisons are crowded, and the final sentence adds little new information.
Combine the final summary with the overview and use the last detail sentence for smaller categories.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary shows range, including outlay, plummeted and trebled, but some words are overdramatic or inaccurate, such as drained and attributed to.
Use neutral data terms such as accounted for, made up, rose, fell and increased more than fourfold.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Grammar is understandable but affected by article errors, verb-form problems and awkward prepositions.
Proofread noun phrases after expenditure, spending and ratio, and keep verbs in past form.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.