The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010.
Sample Response
The two pie charts compare the average nationwide expenditure inexpenses on several household categories including housing, food, healthcare, education, transportation in 1950 and 2010. The share spent on food rose sharplyThe expenditure ratio for food soared in 6 decades while an overwhelming portion of the expenditure went on housingwent on for housing in 1950. Now turning to the details, the bulk of the expenses in 1950 was for housing and foodwas made for the housing and food which accounted for a massive 72.1% and 11.2% of the total expenditures. By contrastIn opposite, it can be observed that people prioritised buying food (34%) more than housing (22%) six decades later. Health care had the lowest share of spending inlowest amount of money spent on in both of the years. In addition, transportation expenses increased markedlyhad remarkably increased by roughly three times from only 3.3% in 1950 to 14% in 2010. In additionAside from that, spending on other items also rose to 19.3% from 4.4% in 1950. The share for educationEducation expense ratio, however, had slightly decreased where people spent 0.3 percentage points moreinsignificantly spent 0.3% more in 19501960 than in 2010. To summarise, basic necessities such as food and housing are the two main categories people spent most percentages of money on, however, health care aspect was the least prioritised.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The report successfully identifies the central change from housing dominance to food becoming the largest expense and supports this with most of the key figures. Its main limitation is reduced accuracy and precision, especially the incorrect reference to 1960 and awkward descriptions of changes; prioritise correcting dates and expressing the major shifts clearly in percentage points.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response identifies the major shift from housing dominance in 1950 to food as the largest category in 2010 and includes most important figures. The main weakness is a wrong date, 1960 instead of 1950, and some imprecise explanation of increases and decreases.
Correct the date error and describe changes in percentage points, especially housing falling from 72.1% to 22% and food rising from 11.2% to 34%.
Coherence and Cohesion
The report has a clear overview and details, and comparisons are generally easy to follow. Some transitions are awkward and the final sentence repeats the overview rather than adding new synthesis.
Group categories into major changes: housing down sharply, food and other up, transport up, and health care still lowest.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is mostly adequate, but expressions such as expense ratio, went on for housing, and lowest amount of money spent on are not fully natural.
Use share of expenditure, accounted for, rose, fell, and remained the smallest category.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
There are several article, preposition, and tense errors, but they rarely block meaning.
Check article use with categories and use by for changes, such as increased by roughly three times.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.