The line graph below gives information about the number of visitors to three London museums between June and September 2013.

Sample Response

1

The graph shows Delete(show) how many people visited Delete(visit) three London museums in the summer of 2013. Most visitors went Delete(go) to the British Museummuseum between June and September. The number fluctuated Delete(fluctuate) between 500,000 and 750,000between 500 and 750. By contrast, the Science Museum and the Natural History Museum received Delete(receive) fewer visitors. The number of people who visited the Science Museum dropped Delete(drop) gradually from 400,000 to 300,000from 400 thousand to 300 from June to August, then roseAugust then rose Delete(rise) to 450 thousand in September. We can see (see) that the trend for the Natural History Museum was (be) similar. There was a drop from about 550,000 to 370,000a sharp drop in visitors from June to July. The number remained stable Delete(remain stable) in August and then increased Delete(increase) steadily in September.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The response communicates the principal patterns clearly and accurately, especially the British Museum’s overall lead and the falls followed by September recoveries. However, it is substantially under length, gives limited detail for two series, and leaves parenthetical base-form prompts in the finished report. Expand the account with selected monthly figures and direct comparisons, then remove the exercise-style brackets so the description reads as a complete formal report.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

5.5
Scoring rule

The main trends are accurate and all three museums are mentioned, but the under-length response provides too few specific values and comparisons.

Next step

Develop the report beyond 150 words with selected figures for the British and Natural History museums and comparisons at key months.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

Information follows a clear museum-by-museum progression, though the single compact paragraph limits the separation of overview and detail.

Next step

Use a short overview paragraph followed by a detail paragraph that groups the two museums with similar downward-then-upward patterns.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.0
Scoring rule

The vocabulary is adequate for describing change, but repetition and the retained base-form prompts reduce precision and formality.

Next step

Remove every parenthetical prompt and vary repeated expressions with precise trend language and direct numerical comparisons.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.5
Scoring rule

The completed clauses show generally accurate control of simple and complex forms, although the inserted base verbs disrupt sentence presentation.

Next step

Present only the correctly inflected verbs and proofread units, including ‘300 thousand’, so every sentence is complete and polished.

Put the feedback to work

Write this task while it is fresh

Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.

IELTS Academic Writing Task 1

The line graph below gives information about the number of visitors to three London museums between June and September 2013.

Your response

Words0
20:00

Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.