The charts below show degrees granted in different fields at the National University in the years 1990, 2000, 2010.
Sample Response
The information regarding the awarded degrees in four different fields by the National University overby National University in the span of twothree decades is depictedhas been depicted in the pie charts. AThe significant feature of these chartsthis graph isportrays that the largest proportion of degrees was grantedmaximum degrees were granted in the computer science fieldin computer science field by National University as computer science accounted for 45%its proportion was accounted for 45% in 2010 after rising from 30% in 1990which had increased gradually from 30% since 1990. Turning to businessMoving further to business stream, the percentage of awarded degrees stood at 30%was noticed as 30% in 1990 before falling by 10 percentage points to 20% in 2000which led to a decline of 10% during 2000. Then, it fell by five percentage pointsdescended slightly to 15% in 2010. An identical pattern was followed by the ratio of awarded degrees in both law and medicine departments. In the case of medicine fieldMedicine department, the proportion of granted degrees was almost a quarter in both 1990 and 2010during 1990 and 2010, however, the proportion was 30% in 2000. Moreover, the percentage of granted degrees in law was the lowest, 10% in 2000 and slightly higher in other two yearsdecades. Hence, it can be deduced that more students graduated in computer science at the National Universityfrom computer science from National University than they did from other faculties.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response covers all four fields, identifies the rise of computer science, and reports most proportions accurately. Its main limitation is awkward, sometimes imprecise language, while the single-paragraph presentation weakens the clarity of an otherwise logical account. The highest priority is to organise the overview and details into distinct paragraphs and express comparisons with more natural, grammatically controlled structures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear overall trend and accurately covers the principal figures for all four subjects, with only minor imprecision in its concluding comparison.
State the overview more precisely by noting that computer science rose from a joint-high position in 1990 to a clear lead in 2010.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information progresses logically from computer science to the other fields, but the single paragraph and somewhat mechanical transitions reduce clarity.
Separate the overview from two grouped detail paragraphs and use direct comparisons instead of transitional fillers such as 'Moving further'.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a sufficient range of trend and comparison vocabulary, although several collocations such as 'proportion was accounted for' are unnatural.
Use precise combinations such as 'accounted for 45%' and 'the proportion of degrees awarded in business' consistently.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the data clearly, but recurring errors in articles, prepositions, and verb forms limit control.
Review complex sentences for accurate passive forms and prepositions, particularly when describing figures awarded by the university.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The charts below show degrees granted in different fields at the National University in the years 1990, 2000, 2010.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.