You would like to buy some electrical goods at a shop in a nearby town. Write a letter to the shop. In your letter: - ask whether the shop has the goods or can order them - ask what the prices are - ask how long the shop can hold the goods for you

Same questionCompare 5 different answers (Band 6.5–7.5)

Sample Response

1

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to inquire about some electricalelectronic goods that I want to purchase. Your shop has been recommended to me by a friend and he mentioned that you have a great variety of quality products and I am hoping to purchase them from you if you have the stock or can manage those for me. I want to purchase a Sony DVD player, a Samsung 3D television set, a Technics turntable, a blender and a radio with long wave capability. Do you have these items in stock, or, if not, will youor if not, will you be able to order them for me? If you do have these items, how long willwould you be able to hold them for me? I am free this weekend and, if you have them, perhaps I can visit the shop on Saturday morningcome over on Saturday morning to purchase and pick them up. However, before travelling to the shopbefore that, I would appreciate a reply from youI am expecting a reply from you regarding the prices and availability of these goodsthe price and availability of those goods. Please write back to me as soon as possible at the above address or ring me at +85-8547120145. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Andrew Moore

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.5

The letter has a clear formal purpose, identifies the requested products precisely, and covers availability, ordering, price, and holding time in a courteous manner. The main limitation is that the response is presented as one uninterrupted paragraph and occasionally uses awkward or repetitive wording. The most valuable improvement would be to divide the requests into logical paragraphs and make the price enquiry more explicit for each item.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

8.0
Scoring rule

The letter achieves its purpose, maintains an appropriate formal tone, and addresses every required request with relevant detail.

Next step

Ask directly for the individual or total prices rather than referring more generally to a reply regarding "the price."

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0
Scoring rule

The ideas follow a sensible sequence from the enquiry and product list to availability, collection, and contact details, but paragraphing is absent.

Next step

Group the introduction, product and price questions, holding arrangements, and closing into separate paragraphs.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.5
Scoring rule

The response uses a good range of precise product and enquiry vocabulary, though some wording is repetitive or unnatural.

Next step

Replace phrases such as "manage those for me" and repeated references to "items" or "goods" with more idiomatic alternatives.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.5
Scoring rule

Complex sentences are handled confidently overall, with only occasional awkward reference and clause construction.

Next step

Shorten the long opening sentences and ensure pronouns such as "those" have clear, natural reference.

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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1

You would like to buy some electrical goods at a shop in a nearby town. Write a letter to the shop. In your letter:

- ask whether the shop has the goods or can order them

- ask what the prices are

- ask how long the shop can hold the goods for you

Your response

Words0
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Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.