Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
A group of people believe that in order to increase the safety on the roadssafety for the driving on roads, governments should make stricter regulations for any undisciplined driving behaviourindiscipline in driving attitudes. By contrastOn the contrary, another group thinks that authorities should consider other effective solutions to the problemsolutions for it. The following essay will discuss both views in detaildetails, but in my opinion, I believein my personal opinion, I do believe that the combination of both ideas would ensure better road safetya better road safety.
On the one hand, many people worry about the number of trafficdriving accidents. Each year, the number of people who are injured or diepass away due to traffic accidents has increased significantly. In most cases, accidents have occurred due to the irresponsible actionsinterdisciplinary acts of the drivers themselves, such as speeding, drunk driving or using their mobile phones whileduring driving. To solveAnd to solve the problem, the government should make strict regulationsa strict regulation about traffic accidents. People who are found to be guilty of any driving rule violation should be punished with severe penalties, including detentionserious penalties and detentions. By having these kinds of policiespolicy, it is hoped that traffic accident rates will decrease gradually.
On the other hand, other people believe that strict punishments would not effectively solve the problem. There are other measures which governments and the public should consider. Firstly, governments could cooperate with the media in creating campaignsmaking campaign about safe driving. Television commercials and magazine advertisements could be used by the government in raising awareness ofsocialising about the negative effectseffect of aggressive or offensive driving. Secondly, governments could also give rewards to their citizens who obeycitizens who are obeying the road regulations. For example, when people renew their driving license, authorities could check their track records. Those who have clean track records could get motor vehicles tax discount or exemption.
In conclusion, people have varying opinionsa varying opinion on how to reduce the number of traffic accidentsnumber traffic accidents. While some people believe that there should be stricter policies and regulations about driving, others think that there should be another effective way of addressing the issue. In my point of view, I believe that both policies have their own positive sides and when people could combine them, it would be an effective way of reducing traffic accidents.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response is well organised around both views and gives a clear, consistent opinion, with relevant measures and examples supporting each side. Its main limitation is persistent imprecision in word choice and grammar, which sometimes makes otherwise sensible points sound unnatural. Focus first on accurate collocations and sentence-level control, then deepen the comparison of why a combined approach would be more effective.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are addressed with relevant explanations and examples, and the preference for combining punishment with other measures remains clear throughout.
Explain more explicitly why the proposed combination would outperform either approach alone, rather than mainly describing the two sides separately.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress clearly through a conventional introduction, two balanced body paragraphs, and a consistent conclusion, with effective overall paragraphing.
Make links within paragraphs less formulaic and ensure each supporting sentence advances the central claim rather than restating the issue.
Lexical Resource
The response uses an adequate range of topic vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate choices and collocations such as interdisciplinary acts and socialising about reduce precision.
Prefer familiar, accurate combinations such as traffic violations, road-safety campaigns, and vehicle-tax discounts over ambitious but unsuitable wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are attempted and meaning remains clear, but errors with articles, agreement, prepositions, noun forms, and conditional structures occur regularly.
Proofread complex sentences for article and verb-form accuracy, especially around plural subjects, relative clauses, and hypothetical recommendations.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.