Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
It is pretty conspicuous that the developmentchariot of any country primarily (if not wholly) depends on the economydrifts on the wheels of the economy, and thereforethence, many governmentsconstituencies believe that making economic progressrising on the economic front is the main prioritypredominant aspect they need to focus on. However, some people argue that other developmental fronts should be taken seriously as well.
The monetary aspect is a quintessential pillar when it comes to the level of developmentdevelopment stature of a country. The GDP, NNP, NI (National income), etc., are some of the deciding factors that indicate how a country is performingas to how a country has been doing. The government, as a result, pursues this goalmoves forth with this prospect becauseas indistinguishably, capital is the primary resourcemost prime thing that fundsharbours other resources directly or indirectly.
By contrastContrary to that, a significant pool of people also advocate the need to strengthenadvocates the requirement of bolstering other areaspurviews of development. They say that if other resources don’t exist, then consequently, economic progress could not be realized to the same extentconsequentially, monetization to an extent wouldn’t be picturized to reality. Prominent facet as human resources, which is the most epitome treasure needs to be equally focussed on. The other related areassubliminal aligned domains should also be given attentionthrown light upon. Taping right from the educational setup, research methodologies, laboratories, medical amenities, etc., in a way, corresponds to the overall enrichment of the lacuna.
In conclusion, it is not the money or monetary front on its own that makes a sovereign state a superpower. It may be a prominent and eminent dimension, but is not the sole determinant for development. A wholesome opulence of a country comes with all-round prosperity as could be inferred, and hence, accentuating on a monochromatic wavelength doesn’t flourish in an array of the gradient of a successful nation, single handedly.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response presents a recognizable discussion of both positions and reaches a consistent conclusion, with an ambitious range of language. Its main limitation is that the supporting ideas remain general and are frequently expressed through inaccurate or over-elaborate wording, which sometimes obscures the logic. The highest-priority improvement is to explain each view with one clear, specific reason or example using simpler, precise vocabulary and more controlled sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and a clear preference for broad-based progress are addressed, but the reasons are only generally developed and lack concrete support.
Develop each view through one specific causal explanation or example that clearly shows why that form of progress matters.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph structure creates a clear overall progression, although some links within paragraphs are mechanical or logically difficult to follow.
Use straightforward topic sentences and arrange each paragraph as claim, explanation, and example, with fewer forced linking expressions.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a wide vocabulary, but very frequent collocational and word-choice errors make several ideas unnatural or obscure.
Prioritize accurate common academic vocabulary and check that every less familiar word fits its intended meaning and collocation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures is attempted, and meaning is usually recoverable despite recurring errors in sentence construction, agreement, and punctuation.
Build shorter complex sentences with clearly matched subjects and verbs, then proofread each clause boundary for completeness and punctuation.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.