Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of this?
Sample Response
The differencesdiscrimination among nations in terms of people's lifestyleslifestyle, access to information, eating habits and cultural aspects are diminishing because ofwith the effect of globalisation and widespread acceptance of technology. Some people see it as a threat to cultural identity, but I take it as a positive sign in terms of improved living standardsimproved lifestyle and better relations among nationsa better relationship among nations. Without a doubt, the merits of this trend outweighthe merits of this exceed the disadvantages. To begin with, globalisation and free-trade policiesfree trade concepts, which have contributed to similarities among nationsthat led to the similarities among nations, were not imposed by a rich nation on the rest of the world. Rather, they emerged in response to the demands of the timeit was a demand of the time that has reduced the gap among countries over time. For example, someone from a developing nation, these days, can accessavail the same branded clothes, food, technological devices and other goods that a citizenand so on a citizen in an industrialised country can have. This not only enhances the freedom of choice for people but also opens windows of opportunitythe windows of opportunity forto local brands on the international stage. If countries look more similar around the globe, it means just one thing - the wealth and life standard gaps among people are declining. Moreover, the trend reduces the cultural gap among nations and helpshelp maintain world peace. Also, a growing number of people nowadays move to wealthier nations to study and workgo to rich nations for study and work, and a similar culture helps them adaptand similar culture makes them adapt to a foreign country more easily. Freedom of the press and easy access to global information has accelerated this trend and there is no stopping itthere is no stopping to it. Finally, the culture and tradition of a nation change over time even without the interference of any externalalien influence. Hence restricting the extensive benefitsoverwhelming facilities this trend brings is not a good idea at all, especially when the world still has large wealth disparitiesa huge wealth gap and animosity among nations. To conclude, the wealth and power gaps among nations may lead to conflicts, and this is why people should be treated as global citizens rather than citizens of a specific country. To make this dream come true, international brands, TV channels and other global facilities should be present in every corner of the world.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response maintains a clear pro-globalisation position and offers several relevant benefits, including wider consumer choice, economic opportunity, and easier cultural adaptation. However, the disadvantages are only acknowledged rather than analysed, and presenting the entire essay as one paragraph weakens its organisation. The priority is to develop a concrete disadvantage before directly comparing its significance with the stated benefits in separate paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position and several relevant advantages are developed, but the disadvantages receive almost no substantive analysis.
Develop at least one specific cultural or economic disadvantage and explicitly explain why the advantages still outweigh it.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument has a broadly logical internal sequence, but the absence of paragraphing obscures the essay's main stages.
Separate the introduction, contrasting considerations, main advantages, and conclusion into clearly focused paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and sufficiently flexible, although several collocations are inaccurate or unnatural.
Replace imprecise phrases such as discrimination among nations, life standard gaps, and overwhelming facilities with natural academic alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A variety of complex structures is attempted successfully, but agreement, relative-clause, comparison, and preposition errors recur.
Proofread complex sentences for subject-verb agreement and complete comparative structures before finalising the response.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of this?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.