Some people think that the increasing business and cultural contact between countries bring many positive developments. Others say it can cause the loss of national identities. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.
Sample Response
People have different views about the impacts of globalization. Although this development could have positive effectsexert positive influences on the national economyon national economy, I am greatly concerned thatI am of great concern that national identities would be erodedthe preservation of national identities would be deterred.
On the one hand, it is argued by many that cross-border economic and cultural cooperation could be a major driver of national growththe major drive of national growth. Firstly, increased international trade could create conditions for an economy to grow by leveraging itstheir competitive advantages and boosting itstheir export earnings. The benefit is best shown through robust economic development of net exporters such as Country Xlike X country. With the elimination of economic barriers between countries, X country, a hub of agricultural products, has earned substantial foreign-exchange earningsa huge flow of foreign exchange by emerging as the second largest rice exporter worldwide. Improvement in people’s spiritual lives would also accompany. In additionBesides that, borderless cultural contact means that people have opportunities to experiencehave chances to get exposed to foreign cultures, whose diversity could enable them to enrich their knowledge and have more entertainment choiceschoices of entertainment. The popularity of Korean and US – UK music products in Y country could exemplify this point.
On the other hand, I believe more strongly thatI am more of the belief that the uniqueness of individual countries could be under threat as a consequence of growing international cooperation. Multinational corporations could put them in a position to influence local cultural values and promote Western ones in nations having their presence. This is because these Western ideologies could be easily assimilated into local cultures when Western-standard products are marketed and consumers familiarize themselves with new lifestyles associated with these goodsnew lifestyles these goods create. This might, in the long run, result in the adoption of a homogeneous set of beliefs and valuesresult in a homogeneous set of beliefs and values adopted and the erosion of cultural diversity worldwide.
In conclusion, it is irrefutable that globalization has supported economic and social developmentbacked economic and social developments in many countries. However, the danger of losing national identities is also obvious. To avoid such a consequence, I believe that nations need to take actionactions to preserve their cultural identity through proper education and bolstered social cohesion.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response addresses both perspectives with a clear, consistently maintained preference and supports its claims through relevant economic and cultural explanations. Its main limitation is that several examples remain generic placeholders and some phrasing is unnatural or imprecise, which reduces authority and fluency. The highest-priority improvement is to replace the invented X and Y examples with specific, fully explained evidence while tightening collocations and sentence wording.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are addressed and the writer's preference is clear, with generally relevant development of economic, cultural, and identity-related effects.
Replace the generic X and Y country examples with specific, credible evidence and explain more precisely how each example proves the claim.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses logically through a clear introduction, two contrasting body sections, and a consistent conclusion.
Strengthen transitions within the first body paragraph so the shift from economic gains to cultural benefits feels less abrupt.
Lexical Resource
A broad topic-specific vocabulary is used, but several collocations and word choices are awkward or imprecise.
Prioritise natural collocations such as economic growth, cultural exposure, and corporate presence instead of forcing more elaborate phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied complex structures with generally good control, although agreement, reference, and article errors occur occasionally.
Check pronoun agreement and noun phrases carefully, especially where countries, corporations, and cultural ideas are referred to across long sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that the increasing business and cultural contact between countries bring many positive developments. Others say it can cause the loss of national identities. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.