Report research suggests that majority of criminals who were sent to prison would commit crimes when they are set free. What do you think of this case? What to be done to solve this problem?
Sample Response
It is a serious and glaring threat to the society, those who have been prosecuted to jail trial and still have a mindset to prevail the crime when they are free. This growingfueling issue needs to be addressedactionable by intervening with strongernabbed laws and strict rules to prevent future offencesavoid happenings in future. Let's discuss some preventive measures could be considered. Firstly, the quality of life in prison should make it very difficult that some individuals been in prison must think that life in prison is miserable. Apparently, school curricula needin school studies itself needs to teacheducate the importance of life and human values should be fosteredthe humanity should be developed in each individual's life. In most documentariesIn most of the documentary regarding the life in prison shown as very simple and has all facilities. This portrayal needs to be correctedThese needs to eradicate, and the facilities being offeredfacility been offered should be limited. Moreover, the government officialsofficial can identify people showing this patternthese trend people and refer them for counselling and rehabilitationmedicate them for counselling to recover. In addition to that, the government needs to study the causes behindcause and reason behind on each individual who has been prosecuted. The trend of committing crimescommitting the crime is often because of poverty and lack of opportunity for each individual. Those who arehave educated know the importance of life and will not avail these kinds of activities, perhaps on the other hand people who struggle to meet their daily needspeople who have been struggling for their daily life, tendtends to commit crimes. It is more on individual's responsibility to take care of them and their surroundings. Each division or urban society can learn their own people's problem and try resolving, if these is been taken care it will be a drastic change, There is a saying ‘little drops make an ocean’. We need to set protocol to follow right rules and disciplinary behaviour in each individual's home, which makes external life easier. In conclusion, to commit crimes again and again or to live an awesome life is individual's responsibility. Everyone needs to understand the importance of life, to respect others in all sense and to safeguard the society. Those who have been prosecuted are needed to be given ample opportunity to survive and to recover out of it.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response identifies recidivism as serious and proposes several potentially relevant measures, including counselling, studying individual causes and improving opportunities. Its main limitation is that the argument is contradictory and difficult to follow: it advocates harsher prison conditions while later supporting rehabilitation, and frequent language errors obscure many claims. Choose a clear rehabilitation-focused position, organise causes and solutions into separate paragraphs, and express each measure in direct, grammatically complete sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both the problem and possible solutions are addressed, but the central view is unclear and many proposed measures are insufficiently explained or mutually inconsistent.
Adopt one coherent approach and develop two linked solutions, such as rehabilitation in prison and employment support after release.
Coherence and Cohesion
Some basic sequencing markers are present, but the single dense paragraph, abrupt shifts and weak referencing make the line of reasoning difficult to follow.
Use an introduction, one paragraph on causes, one on solutions and a conclusion, with each paragraph built around a clear topic sentence.
Lexical Resource
There is an attempt to use varied vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate choices such as "prevail the crime," "nabbed laws" and "trend people" obscure meaning.
Use precise core terms such as "reoffend," "rehabilitation," "former prisoners," "counselling" and "employment opportunities."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent errors in sentence boundaries, verb forms, agreement, articles and clause construction often make meaning hard to retrieve.
Write shorter subject-verb-object sentences and check every clause for a finite verb before combining ideas.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Report research suggests that majority of criminals who were sent to prison would commit crimes when they are set free. What do you think of this case? What to be done to solve this problem?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.