Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
In this era of globalisation, education hasglobalisation,” Education “, has become a part of every individual’s identity. But the central questionthe bone of contention is whether students should attend single-sex or coeducational schoolswhether to get educated in separate or co-education schools. This has been a debateddebatable topic since the inception of the education system. The following essay will discuss the benefits of both school typesbeneficial aspects of both schools and my opinion. Regarding peopleIn regard to the citizens who believe that segregated schools are better places for their children, there are several benefitspositive impacts; firstly, it is believed that separating boys and girls would makewhen boys and girls are separated, it would make them more disciplined. Secondly, they tend to be more focused on their studiesfocused on studies rather than being distracted byto teenage distractionsall fantasies of teenage. So this would likely bring out them with flying colours and prosper in life. On the other handOn the flip side, it is undeniable that co-education schools are also highly beneficialfar more beneficial. This is because the interaction between boys and girls in this environmentinteraction which occurs in this environment between boys and girls helps create healthy relationshipscreates a healthy relationship, which naturally tends to make them more comfortable in later stages of life. This is not all; this education system makes her free from shyness and fear. For exampleillustration, if a girl who is educated at a coeducational schooleducated in co-education school joins a company for a job, she will feel free to communicate and socialise with others, since she would have shed her hesitation and nervousnessshredded all her hesitations and nervousness in her school days. This would definitely lead her on the right path both in career and life. In a nutshell, mixed education imparts more and more benefits on students and these would facilitate them to progress in life. In my perspective, when both genders are educated together, it would bring out the best citizens who could serve as a torch bearer for posterity by making them aware of their own limits and culture of the society.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response covers both school models and gives a clear preference for mixed education, with its strongest support coming from the workplace communication example. Its main limitation is weak presentation and language control: the entire essay forms one paragraph, and frequent awkward expressions obscure otherwise relevant ideas. The highest-priority improvement is to organise the two views into separate paragraphs and explain each advantage in direct, accurately constructed sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are addressed and the preference for mixed schooling is clear, but the separate-school case is only briefly developed and some benefits are asserted rather than explained.
Explain why greater discipline and focus would result from separation, then compare those benefits directly with the social advantages of mixed schooling.
Coherence and Cohesion
The sequence from separate schools to mixed schools and a conclusion is clear, but the single-paragraph format and shifting pronouns weaken organisation.
Use an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a concise conclusion so each stage of the argument has a distinct purpose.
Lexical Resource
The writer attempts varied and sometimes less common vocabulary, but frequent awkward collocations and misused idioms reduce precision.
Prefer natural phrases such as 'distracted by teenage relationships', 'overcome hesitation', and 'provide benefits to students'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mixture of simple and complex structures communicates the main message, although errors in pronouns, articles, word order, and clause control recur.
Maintain consistent plural reference to students and revise structures such as 'help them achieve good results and prosper'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.