The three pie charts below show the changes in annual spending by a particular UK school in 1981, 1991 and 2001.
Sample Response
A glance at the three given graphs reveals some differences among the expenditures per year of a British school in a period of three years: 1981, 1991, 2001.
Overall, it can be seen that there are many trends that are obviously illustrated in those charts: upward, downward and both upward and downward. The changes of those features can be divided into two main groups on account of their trends: single trend and couple trends group.
Starting with the first group, insurance and other workers’ salaries, in 1981, the insurance only took two percent of the total, however, in twenty years later, the number experienced a considerable growth of six percent to eight percent. Unlike the insurance, the salaries of other workers witnessed a respective drop from approximately thirty percent to a mere fifteen percent in about twenty years.
Moving on to the second group, we can see that both teachers-salaries’ and resources’ proportions significantly fluctuated. In the first ten years of the period, the numbers rose five and ten percent to reach fifty and twenty percent, however, slipped dramatically in the next years from fifty to forty-five and from twenty to a mere nine percent. In contrast, furniture and equipment spending first experienced a decrease and then quickly climbed from five percent in 1991 to twenty percent, a growth of eighteen percent.
It is interesting to note that through approximately twenty years, the total spending on different things of this UK school changed considerably.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use concise spending term Original: expenditures per year Suggested revision: annual expenditure Why it matters: Annual expenditure is the natural concise term for yearly spending.
- 2. Match task wording Original: British Suggested revision: UK Why it matters: UK school matches the institution described in the task.
- 3. Correct time span Original: in a period of three years Suggested revision: in three selected years over a 20-year period Why it matters: The charts show three selected years spanning 1981 to 2001, not a three-year period.
- 4. State trends directly Original: many trends that are obviously illustrated Suggested revision: several clear trends Why it matters: The shorter phrase introduces the overview without empty signalling language.
- 5. Fix change preposition Original: The changes of those features Suggested revision: The changes in those categories Why it matters: Changes in correctly describes variation within spending categories.
- 6. Name trend groups clearly Original: single trend and couple trends group Suggested revision: consistent-trend and fluctuating-trend groups Why it matters: The revision clearly distinguishes categories moving one way from those changing direction.
- 7. Remove unnecessary article Original: the insurance only took Suggested revision: insurance accounted for only Why it matters: Insurance is uncountable here, and accounted for is the natural proportion phrase.
- 8. Remove faulty preposition Original: in twenty years later Suggested revision: twenty years later Why it matters: Later directly follows the time span without in.
- 9. Refer to proportion Original: number Suggested revision: proportion Why it matters: The chart reports a percentage share, not a count.
- 10. Use percentage points Original: growth of six percent to eight percent Suggested revision: increase of six percentage points to 8% Why it matters: Insurance rose from 2% to 8%, a change of six percentage points.
- 11. Use exact chart value Original: approximately thirty percent Suggested revision: 28% Why it matters: The 1981 share for other workers' salaries is labelled 28%.
- 12. Fix possessive phrases Original: both teachers-salaries’ and resources’ proportions Suggested revision: both teachers' salaries and spending on resources Why it matters: The revision corrects the possessive and names resource spending naturally.
Suggested Rewrites
- expenditures per year annual expenditure
- British UK
- in a period of three years in three selected years over a 20-year period
- many trends that are obviously illustrated several clear trends
- The changes of those features The changes in those categories
- single trend and couple trends group consistent-trend and fluctuating-trend groups
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response covers all five spending categories and generally reports their movements accurately, using a sensible grouping by trend. Its main limitation is an overly vague overview that does not identify the dominant category or the most significant changes, while some figures and expressions lack precision. The highest-priority improvement is to state two concrete overview features, such as teachers' salaries remaining largest and furniture spending changing most sharply.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All categories are covered with mostly accurate trends, but the overview is generic and furniture spending in 2001 is understated as 20% instead of 23%.
Highlight the largest category and the most notable rises and falls in the overview, using exact figures selectively.
Coherence and Cohesion
Grouping categories by consistent and fluctuating trends supports progression, although the grouping labels and some long sentences are cumbersome.
Use clear paragraph topics such as steady changes and fluctuating categories, then keep each comparison within a controlled sentence.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, but awkward phrases and imprecise category labels reduce naturalness.
Use standard expressions such as rose by six percentage points, fluctuated, and spending on teachers' salaries.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms conveys the comparisons, but articles, prepositions, possessives, and comma-linked clauses are frequently inaccurate.
Separate independent clauses and proofread noun phrases and time expressions before finalising the report.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The three pie charts below show the changes in annual spending by a particular UK school in 1981, 1991 and 2001.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.