Some people think that dangerous sports should be banned, while others think people have freedom to choose sports activities they like. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Nowadays, people's awareness of doing sports has become more widespread, and the questionIn the era that people's awareness of concentrating on doing sports has became more and more universal. The question of whether people should participate in extreme sportsattend some sports with high risks has sparked an intense debate. Before presenting my own opinion, two opposite viewsBefore presenting my own opinion two opposite views will be further analyzed. Initially, there is noon denying that dangerous sports actually bring a few positive benefitspostive feedbacks to some peoplea part of people who really need some extremely exciting ways to search for some a sense of achievementfeelings of achivements. In order to realise their personal aims, they need to spend more energy and timetimes in training and exercise, which could help them build a stronger bodya more strong body and strengthen their immune system. What's more, more and more related infrastructureinfrastructures will be added to satisfy their increasing needs. MeanwhileAt the meanwhile, there are more opportunities for those who need jobs to surviveservive and support their familiesfamily. When it comes to the reasons why people ought to ban dangerous sportsinhibit some dangerous sports are that some dangerous sports have extremelysuper high potential risks because of the lackbecause the lack of security guarantee. In addition, the people who prefer doing some dangerous sports just seek personal excitementseek for personal excitements without providing any advantages to the society, while they will get injured more easily, thus it would put more pressure on the healthcare systemcause more pressure to medical system and result in a waste ofmake a waste of precious public resources. In conclusion, we ought to prohibit some sports that do not benefit society because of individual selfishnesssports can’t offer benefits to the society because those people’s selfishness. However, the other dangerous sports that can be done underat the supervision of officials and regular associations could be accepted.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay effectively addresses both sides of the debate and presents a nuanced concluding opinion regarding the regulation of dangerous sports. However, the overall clarity is diminished by frequent grammatical inaccuracies and spelling errors. To improve, focus on refining sentence structures and proofreading for correct word forms and spelling before submission.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response discusses both perspectives required by the prompt and concludes with a clear, balanced position.
Fully develop main ideas with more specific real-world examples rather than generalized assertions.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is organized into logical paragraphs with a clear overall progression throughout the essay.
Use cohesive devices and transition phrases more naturally to avoid occasional mechanical phrasing.
Lexical Resource
The essay uses a varied range of vocabulary, though noticeable spelling mistakes and awkward word choices occur frequently.
Review key vocabulary for accurate spelling and context-appropriate word forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of complex structures is attempted, but frequent grammatical errors in verb tense and sentence construction interrupt the flow.
Focus on mastering relative clauses and correct auxiliary verb forms to reduce structural errors.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that dangerous sports should be banned, while others think people have freedom to choose sports activities they like. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.