In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family?
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Sample Response
In Britain, many elderly people often move into residential nursing homestend to live with their peers at a nursing home. Although most people believe that governmentgovernment's funding should be spent to sustain this care, I believe that the family should also contribute financiallyprovide for their family members.
To begin with, families have a moral responsibility to take care of their loved ones. FamiliesFamily can show care for their elderly members through daily or monthly spending at the nursing facility. There are always examples of wealthy families whowealthy families, who are willing to pay entirely for their elderly relatives to stay in a nursing facilityin nursing facility, but they are in the minority; often, many familiesfamily would struggle to make ends meetmeet end needs.
In addition, from a broader perspectiveOn the other hand, some people would argue that senior citizensold people have substantially contributed to society and, therefore, are entitled to government support later in their lives. This may be true, but there are people living on government funding for thea vast majority of their liveslife. As far as society is concerned, government funding is limited. Spending a large amount of money on the elderly population in nursing homeshome would put great pressure on other areas that need funding such as child care, maintaining food security and sheltering the homelessproviding homes for homeless people.
In conclusion, I believe the majority would benefit from government funding to support the operation of nursing homeshome. However, the family cannot transfer the responsibility of caring for their loved ones entirely to the government. I believe that the family should to some extentmore-or-less contribute daily or monthly, depending on their capacity, to support their loved onesone.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay presents a clear and nuanced position, arguing for a shared financial responsibility between the government and the family. Progression throughout the paragraphs is logical and cohesive, supported by appropriate vocabulary and control over sentence structures. To elevate the response, the candidate should expand on key arguments with more detailed, specific examples and refine minor grammatical slips.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response directly addresses the prompt by proposing a clear, balanced stance on how care should be funded.
Provide more concrete evidence or specific illustrative examples to support the main arguments more fully.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information and ideas are organized logically with a clear progression throughout the essay.
Enhance paragraph transitions by using a wider variety of linking devices to connect contrasting viewpoints more smoothly.
Lexical Resource
A good range of topic-specific vocabulary is used accurately to convey subtle meanings.
Focus on natural word partnerships and idiomatic phrasing, such as correctly using the idiom 'make ends meet'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A variety of complex structures are used with good grammatical control and overall clarity.
Eliminate minor errors in article usage, plural nouns, and possessive forms to achieve consistently error-free sentences.