The diagram below gives the information about the Hawaiian island chain in the centre of the Pacific Ocean.
Sample Response
The given illustration presents information on the Hawaiian island chain in the centre ofHawaiian Island Chain centre of the Pacific Ocean. As is observed from the diagram, the Hawaiian island chain is formed as the Pacific tectonic plate moves over a static hotspotdirectly affects the Pacific tectonic plate and in this processbecause of it, this plate shifts around 7–9 centimetres per year7-9 centimetre per year.
As is observed from the diagramgraph, below the Pacific Ocean, the Hawaiian island chain consists of several volcanoesstands as several volcanos which are up to 80 million years oldalmost 80 million years old. These volcanoes lie onvolcanos stand over the Pacific plate and the eruptions of these volcanoesvolcanos’ createcreated a new volcano just over the magma plumeMagna spume. The Pacific plate is situated on solid, dense rocksolid dense rock and because of the new volcano development; the hotspot plumehot spot spume remainsremained static. The eruption process of the volcano’s starts from as deep as 2800 km and that has spat the solid rock layer.
Major islands within 100 km of this area are Maui, Molokai, Oahu and Kauai and because of the eruption and sliding of the plates, the centre of the Pacific Ocean is ever changing.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response identifies several relevant elements, including plate movement, the static hot spot, the deep origin of eruptions, and some named islands. However, it lacks a clear overall summary and presents parts of the volcanic process inaccurately or unclearly, with imprecise terms such as 'Magna spume' obscuring meaning. The priority is to explain the sequence accurately from the diagram and distinguish the fixed hot spot from the moving plate and progressively older volcanoes.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Several relevant features are reported, but the overview is unclear and important relationships in the process are inaccurate or omitted.
State the overall relationship between the static hot spot, the moving plate, and the increasing age of volcanoes before adding accurate stages.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response uses a sensible introduction-body-conclusion structure, although repetition and some loosely connected statements weaken progression.
Organise the body as a clear chronological process and use reference words to connect each stage without repeating the same opening phrase.
Lexical Resource
There is some relevant geological vocabulary, but frequent misspellings and inaccurate choices such as 'spume' and 'spat' reduce precision.
Use the diagram's exact technical terms, including magma plume, hot spot, tectonic plate, eruption, and solid dense rock.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentences communicates the main ideas, but agreement, articles, possessives, and punctuation are often inaccurate.
Check plural verb forms and remove incorrect apostrophes in plural nouns, especially in references to volcanoes and eruptions.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The diagram below gives the information about the Hawaiian island chain in the centre of the Pacific Ocean.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.