Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Many argue that competing in a variety of daily environments is a positive forceis a positive, while others feel a focus on cooperation would be ideal. In my opinion, although competition can yield transformational results, it is more valuable to embrace cooperation as a guiding principle.
Those who argue in favor of competition contend that it serves as a powerful motivationserves as powerful motivation. Examples of the impact of competition extendexend to many segments of life, including school and work. In schools, the desire to compete can lead a student to study harder than their classmates in order to achieve better grades and earn respectsecure esteem from teachers and family members. At work, competition for promotions and higher compensation packages is a major reasonthe entire reason that individuals work diligently in most workplacesin the majority of company contexts. However, at home, competition rarely has positive ramifications. Family members whothat are consistently competing for admiration and recognitionrecoginition are likely to suffer from mental health difficultiessome degree of poor mental health.
Indeed, there is greater value in fostering a cooperative environment. When individuals work together in teams, whether it be at school, work, or in the home, they are more likely to experience high levels of motivation and, more crucially, enjoymentmotivation, and more crucially, enjoyment. Competition can serve as a catalyst for achievement but is unlikely to engender the same degree of shared satisfactionthe same heights of unifying satisfaction. A standout example of this would be the dynamics present on a sports team at any level of competition. Even though the players on the team are engaged in a competition, their most memorable and lasting experiencesthe most memorable and lasting memories of their experiences are more likely to come from small moments of comradery shared with teammates. This is the reason that many cite times spent working in groups towards a common goal as the highlights of life.
In conclusion, although competition can encourage innovation, cooperation provides a more vital environment of mutual respect and enjoyment of life. Depending on the situation, it is therefore imperative to seek cooperative understanding.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay presents a clear preference for cooperation while giving both views substantial attention, and its strongest feature is the sustained development of ideas across school, work, home, and team settings. Its main limitation is that some claims are overstated and several spelling or word-choice slips weaken an otherwise polished style. The priority is to qualify sweeping assertions and complete a careful final proofread for lexical accuracy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and the writer's opinion are clearly addressed through relevant, extended reasoning and illustrative contexts.
Qualify absolute claims about workplace motivation and make the cooperation example more directly comparative.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument is logically sequenced, well paragraphed, and connected with generally unobtrusive cohesive devices.
Tighten the transition within the competition paragraph so the shift from benefits to family drawbacks feels more deliberate.
Lexical Resource
The response shows broad, sophisticated vocabulary, but misspellings and a few strained collocations reduce precision.
Proofread spelling carefully and replace inflated phrases with simpler, more idiomatic alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentence forms are varied and largely accurate, with errors rare and communication consistently clear.
Check agreement and modifier choices in longer sentences to preserve accuracy at this high level.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.