It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?
Sample Response
Some people believe that children can not distinguish right from wrong, and parents and teachers should instil moral values and responsibility in theminstil morality and responsibility in them even if this requires imposingeven if it means imposing a form of punishmentsome sort of punishment. I agree with this opinion, but I believe that they must first explain and advise them, and only after several violations or impish acts, they should use punishment. They should also ensure that punishment does not affectmake sure that punishment should not affect a child negatively; rather it must be constructive for the childconstructive for them.
Nowadays, children are easily influencedvulnerable to being negatively affected by their surroundings, peers, electronic media, and social mediapeers and electronic and social media. Hence, parents and teachersHence parents and teachers must teach them morality and teach them to distinguishmake them aware of distinguishing right from wrong. At an early age, children have boundless curiosity and they may imitate what they see, which can have disastrous consequencesand that turns out to be disastrous at times. To prevent this behaviourTo avoid that, minor punishment can be an effective methodminor punishment is the best way as fear of punishment deters them frommakes them stay away from many wrongdoings. To prove that, Stanford University has done many surveys on children and the results show that 80% of children who had already been punished for their particular mistakes had not repeated the same.
But we need to understand that punishments should always be linked to a lessonassociated with some lessons for children. TheyIt must not be physically or mentally harmful. For example, the World's Nursery in Japan asks children to plant trees as a punishment. Many schools in India punish children by asking them to run a few kilometres. Such punishments are beneficial to children's health and societyconstructive for children's health and society, and cancould also teach children that their actions have consequences.
To conclude, I believe that children have to learn about positives and negatives and punishment is one of the effective ways to guide them to learn this distinction. However, parents and teachers must use constructive punishmentsconstructive and positive punishments to guide them towards good behaviourshow them the right path.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response answers both parts of the task with a clear, qualified position and offers concrete examples of constructive punishment. Its main limitation is that some support is asserted rather than convincingly explained, and the proposed physical exercise is not examined for possible harm. The highest-priority improvement is to develop a principled distinction between acceptable consequences and harmful punishment, then evaluate each example against it.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the necessity of punishment and identifies permissible forms, maintaining a clear position throughout.
Explain why each proposed consequence is educational and safe, rather than relying on unsupported statistics or assumptions.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a clear paragraph structure with logical progression and generally effective linking.
Make the connection between the general principle and each punishment example more explicit within the third paragraph.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is sufficiently varied and generally precise, with some less natural combinations and imprecise expressions.
Use more natural terms such as 'misbehaviour,' 'right and wrong,' and 'beneficial to children' in place of awkward collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex sentences is used with generally accurate control, and errors rarely affect clarity.
Refine clause structure and reference, particularly in sentences using repeated coordination or unclear pronouns such as 'that.'
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IELTS Writing Task 2
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.