The chart shows the amount of leisure time enjoyed by men and women of different employment status.
Sample Response
The graph compares the amount of leisure time enjoyed by people of different employment statuseslevels in a typical week in the year 1998-1999.
In the given bar chartcolumn graph, no data has been provided for the men employed part-timepart-time employed and male homemakershouse-staying men. In the remaining categoriesFor rest of the cases, menMen have more leisure time than women of the same category. The highest numberamount of leisure hours is enjoyed by those whothose, who are unemployed. Unemployed men had approximately 85 hours of spare time and women from the same category had about about 78 hours83 hours. Retired peopleThe retired people also enjoyed the a similar amount of leisure timesame amount of leisure activities as did the unemployed men and women. By comparisonOn the contrary, full-time employed men had a total of about 45 hours of leisure time40 hours leisure time compared to about about 38 hours37 hours of women in the same categorywomen from the same status. Finally, women with part-time jobs had 40 hours of leisure time40 hours to spend for their leisure activities and housewives had 50 hours of leisure time50 hours leisure time per week.
In conclusion, unemployed and retiredretire people, both men and women enjoyed more leisure time than employed people and men had more leisure time than women andmen compared to women had more time for leisure activities.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response gives a clear overview of the dominant patterns and covers every employment category, with generally sensible comparisons between men and women. Its main weakness is numerical precision: unemployment and full-time figures are misstated, while retired and unemployed groups are treated as identical. Prioritise careful reading and reporting of exact approximate values, then express comparisons with more natural grammar and collocations.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and broad coverage of all categories are supported by relevant comparisons, although several figures are inaccurate or insufficiently differentiated.
Check each bar carefully and distinguish close values, particularly the female unemployment figure and the differences between unemployed and retired groups.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically from an introduction through detailed comparisons to a summary, but the long central paragraph and occasional faulty linking reduce fluency.
Group the categories into two focused detail paragraphs and use contrast markers only where the relationship is genuinely contrasting.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is adequate for describing categories and comparisons, but several choices such as employment levels, house-staying, and leisure activities are awkward or imprecise.
Use precise chart language such as employment status, housewives, leisure time, and hours per week consistently.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the data clearly, though article, word-form, capitalisation, and comparative-structure errors recur.
Edit for missing articles and correct forms, especially the rest of the cases, retired people, and men had more leisure time than women.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart shows the amount of leisure time enjoyed by men and women of different employment status.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.