The first chart below shows the results of a survey which sampled a cross-section of 100,000 people asking if they traveled abroad and why they traveled for the period 1994-98. The second chart shows their destinations over the same period.
Sample Response
The supplied charts depict the resultsan outcome of a survey conducted among 100,000 people and the survey askedasks their reasons for travellingthe reason behind the journey and preferred destinations between 1994 and 1998between the periods of 1994 and 1998.
In the first graph, in 1994, holidays werethe holiday was the main reason forthe most significant reason behind UK residents' travelthe United Kingdom citizen's travel and it accounted for 15,246 visitsaccounted 15.246 people whereaswhereas, 982 visits were made for other reasonspeople were traveled because of unspecified reasons. Interestingly, in the case of business and visit to friends and relatives, almost an equal number of people visited 3115 and 2689 respectively. In the number of holiday goers, though, there was a slight decrease in the figure in 1995, rest of the years there was a gradual increase in the account and reached above 20 thousand. In spite of some declines in 1995downward trends in the initial year (1995), there was an overall increase in all categoriesa marginal increase in all the categories.
From the year 1994 to 1998, it is clearly seen the trend that North America and other areas obtained a rock bottom position with less than 2000 people. By contrastOn the contrary, the number of visitors to Europe was the highestat a zenith level with around 20,000 per yearand, besides it showed an overall increasea gradual hike in the total number of visitors to all the three destinations.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response’s strongest feature is its broad coverage of both purposes and destinations, including the dominance of holidays and Western Europe and the general rise after 1995. Its main limitation is unreliable precision: several figures are misstated or weakly framed, and the smaller destination categories are inaccurately described as remaining below 2,000. Prioritise a clear overall summary followed by exact, well-grouped comparisons from each visual.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The report addresses both visuals and identifies their main dominant categories and overall growth, but several values and destination comparisons are inaccurate or insufficiently developed.
Report the 1994 and 1998 endpoints accurately and distinguish Western Europe’s strong growth from the smaller but rising North America and other-area totals.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction, purpose paragraph and destination paragraph create a logical broad sequence, though progression within sentences is weakened by loose linking and overloaded clauses.
Give one concise overview after the introduction, then use separate, clearly ordered comparisons for purposes and destinations.
Lexical Resource
There is some range in describing change and ranking, but expressions such as “rock bottom position,” “zenith level” and “gradual hike” are inappropriate or imprecise for a formal report.
Use neutral chart language such as “lowest,” “highest,” “rose gradually” and “accounted for” with consistent references to visits or travellers.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts complex sentences, but frequent errors in articles, agreement, passive forms, prepositions and clause construction reduce accuracy throughout.
Build shorter complete clauses, checking structures such as “accounted for,” “people travelled,” and “the number reached” before combining comparisons.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The first chart below shows the results of a survey which sampled a cross-section of 100,000 people asking if they traveled abroad and why they traveled for the period 1994-98. The second chart shows their destinations over the same period.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.