The chart below shows the percentage of young people in higher education in four different countries in 2000, 2005 and 2010.
Sample Response
The yielded bar charts demonstrate four different countries namely Country A, County B, County C and County D young students percentage in higher education in 2000, 2005 and 2010.
Overall, itut can be clearly seen that the proportion rose over timeyear by year proportion was rose in all countries except Country B. Additionally, CountryCounty D had the highest percentage in all years.
For Country A, in 2000, young people who studying higher education was 38% which grew dramatically and continuously roughly one in tenth percentage per half a decade. In 2010 had 62%. For CountriesCountry B and C, their percentages were identical in 2000, although they differed laterthe percentage was identical in 2010 although, later it differ. Country B's proportion dropped by 5 percentage pointsFormer one nation proportion drop 5% after 5 years and remained at 43% in the final yearin final year. However, the latter country's percentagelater country percentage rose and remained unchanged until 2010;remained unchanged till 2010, it had the same proportionit had same proportion as CountryCounty A had in 2005.
For Country D, with the highest proportion in 2000, this country had on account of 64% which surged later, between 2000 and 2005, it climbed sharply 14%. In 2010, the percentageIn 2010 percentage was 80%four in fifth and over the decadebetween a decade, it rose by 16 percentage points, the second-largest increaseit rose 16% which was second highest after Country A.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response's strongest feature is its clear overview, which correctly identifies Country D as consistently highest and Country B as the only country without an overall rise. However, several comparisons are inaccurate or confusing, and frequent grammatical and collocational errors sometimes obscure the intended meaning. The highest priority is to report each country's figures precisely in straightforward sentences, especially the contrasting patterns for Countries B and C.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response gives an accurate overview and covers all four countries, but it misstates the 2010 comparison between Countries B and C and inaccurately says Country B remained at 43%.
Check every numerical comparison against the chart and describe Country B's fall from 46% to 41% followed by its slight recovery to 43%.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overview and country-based paragraphing create a broadly clear progression, although unclear references such as 'former one nation' and 'later country' weaken cohesion.
Name each country directly and use simple comparison links so that every reference and contrast is immediately clear.
Lexical Resource
There is some relevant trend vocabulary, including 'identical,' 'surged,' and 'remained unchanged,' but frequent word-choice and word-form errors reduce precision.
Use accurate chart collocations such as 'the proportion rose by 14 percentage points' and avoid unsuitable phrases such as 'yielded bar charts' and 'on account of 64%.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts complex structures, but frequent errors with agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction make several clauses difficult to follow.
Prioritize complete subject-verb structures and accurate past-tense forms, for example 'the proportion rose' and 'young people studying in higher education accounted for 38%.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the percentage of young people in higher education in four different countries in 2000, 2005 and 2010.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.