In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Sample Response
These days, many individuals are opting to hire personal fitness trainers instead of participating in sportsengaging in traditional sports or exercise classes. This trend can be attributed to several factors. While this shift towards personal fitness training may offer some benefitsmay have its merits, it also raises serious drawbackssignificant concerns. I believe that it is a negative development because the increasing preference for personal fitness trainers reflects the lack of community engagement and a disparity in the affordability of this service.
One of the main reasons people choose personal fitness trainerspeople are choosing personal fitness trainers is the desire for fitness plans tailoredcustomised fitness plans tailored to their specific needs and goals. Unlike standardised exercise classes, personal trainers can design workouts that target individual strengths and weaknesses, making their trainingmaking the fitness journey more efficient and effective. Additionally, personal trainers provide personalised attention and support, which can be especially helpful for those seekingparticularly appealing to those seeking motivation and accountability in their training effortsfitness endeavours. For instance, in countries like the United States, where a culture of individualism prevails, many people prefer personalised services across various areas of their livesin various aspects of their lives, including fitness.
This trend raises concerns about its affordability and broader drawbacksconcerns about its accessibility and potential drawbacks. Personal fitness training can be expensive, making it a service that many people cannot afforda luxury that may not be affordable for everyone. This may exacerbate existing health disparities, as access to personalised fitness services becomes limited to those who can afford them. Furthermore, the shift towards personal training might lead to reduced participation in group sports or exercise classes, which can diminish a sense of communitythe sense of community and camaraderie that such activities often foster. Therefore, it is mostly a negative development.
In conclusion, not all can afford the luxury of having personal fitness trainers. So efforts should be made to promote the benefits of group sports and exercise classes, as they can create a sense of community and encourage social interaction while supporting individual fitness goals for all.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongest in its direct, well-organised treatment of both the reasons for personal training and the case that the trend is largely negative. Its main limitation is that the example about American individualism is asserted rather than closely demonstrated, while a few phrases are slightly awkward. The highest-priority improvement is to deepen that supporting example and sharpen the wording of the affordability argument without adding unnecessary material.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses both questions, maintains a clear position, and develops relevant reasons and consequences in depth.
Make the individualism example more concrete by explaining precisely how it drives people away from group exercise.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument is sequenced clearly across purposeful paragraphs, and cohesion is controlled without distracting the reader.
Strengthen the transition into the negative-development paragraph by explicitly linking its drawbacks to the preference explained earlier.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide, precise, and suitably academic, with only occasional awkward phrasing.
Refine phrases such as “a disparity in the affordability” and avoid repeating forms of “personal” where a precise substitute is available.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is handled accurately, with only rare minor lapses.
Polish the few less natural constructions, especially “not all can afford,” while preserving the existing sentence variety.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.