Although many people value their public parks, this space could be better used for other purposes such as residential areas for the ever growing population or to develop business and boost economies. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Sample Response

1

Parks are important in our livesimportant to our life; they give us clean and fresh air and givegives us an area forof jogging, walking and playing. It is argued by many that park space can be used for residential purposes as there is a need forof space due to the growing population in our societies. I believe, not only park provides relaxation and greenery; it also takes us close to nature which is lacking due to ever-growing increase of concrete buildings. Nevertheless, after working hardafter hard work everyone needs relaxation and rest which most of the timetimes can be met in parksis fulfilled by parks. The relaxing environment of a parkenvironment of park providesgives a soothing experience for anyone who is looking for tranquillity. For instance, I go to the office every daygo to office every day and after returning I sit and relax in the park to clear my mindcool down my mind from the stress from my officethe stress which I took from my office ( Which is usually taken from my office). Moreover, parks provide shade in summersummers and can be used for basking in winterwinters. People enjoy sitting under a tree or bushes which keeps them out from the hot sunshine in summer seasons. Similarly, in winters, people love to sit in the park to bask and to get rid of the cold waves. However, because of the large area occupied by parksdue to the large area acquired by the park and growing demand for residential buildings there is a need to consider the need for parkscontemplate on the need of parks. It has been evident in the past that demolishing parksdemolishing of parks and making space for the buildings has helped to meet the need for residential spaceis sufficing the need of residential space. For instance, urbanisation is increasing day by day and covering large which was earlier acquired for the parks. Therefore, it is discernible that space can be made out from these parks for residential areas. In, I believe, parks are a useful part of our life, they should be demolished to make space for residential colonies. Not only do they bringNot only they bring us close to nature, they also provide necessary oxygen and greenery which is lacking these days in the urban areas full of concrete buildings.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 5.0

The response presents several relevant benefits of parks and some consideration of housing pressure, supported by personal examples and a usable range of vocabulary. Its central weakness is an inconsistent position: it values parks throughout, then says they should be demolished before immediately defending them again. The priority is to state one clear degree of agreement and make every paragraph and the conclusion consistently support it.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

5.0
Scoring rule

Relevant arguments appear on both sides, but the writer's position is unclear and the conclusion directly contradicts itself.

Next step

State a definite degree of agreement in the introduction and use the conclusion to confirm that same position without contradiction.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

5.0
Scoring rule

The discussion has a recognisable movement from park benefits to housing pressure, but absent paragraphing and inaccurate transitions weaken overall progression.

Next step

Organise the response into distinct paragraphs with one controlling idea each and use transitions only when their logical relationship is accurate.

LR

Lexical Resource

5.5
Scoring rule

The response attempts some less common vocabulary, but frequent collocational and word-choice problems make several phrases awkward or imprecise.

Next step

Prioritise natural combinations such as need for space, relieve stress, and land occupied by parks before adding more ambitious vocabulary.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

5.0
Scoring rule

A mix of simple and complex structures conveys the main meaning, though frequent errors occur in agreement, articles, prepositions, and sentence boundaries.

Next step

Edit each sentence for subject-verb agreement and article use, then split or recast structures whose clauses are not securely connected.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

Although many people value their public parks, this space could be better used for other purposes such as residential areas for the ever growing population or to develop business and boost economies. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Your response

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