Some people say that young people should be encouraged to leave home when they become adults, while others claim it is better if they remain with their family. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
Whether young adults should be encouragedmotivated to leave home or remain with their families is a controversial issue. Some argue that leaving home fosters independence and personal growth, while others believe that staying with family provides crucial support during the early stages of adulthood. This essay will discuss both perspectives and argue thatpresent the opinion that encouraging young adults to leave home can be beneficial for their development.
Proponents of young people leaving homeProponents of encouraging young people to leave home argue that it promotes self-reliance and maturity. By living independently, young adults must manage their finances, household chores, and time, which equips them with essential life skills. For example, those who move out for university or work learn to budget their expenses, cook for themselves, and balance their professional and personal lives. These experiences can help them become responsible and capable adultsaccelerate their transition into responsible and capable adults, better prepared to face future challenges.
On the other hand, some believe that young adults should remain with their families for longer periods to benefit from emotional and financial support. Living at home can alleviate the stress associated with the costs of housing, education, and daily livingthe high costs of housing, education, and other living expenses. Moreover, a supportive family environmentthe familial environment can provide a strong support system, fostering emotional stability and guidance during periods of important decision-makingcritical decision-making phases. For instance, young adults who live with their families might find it easier to save money for future goalsinvestments, such as buying a house or starting a business, without the immediate pressure of financial independence.
While both perspectives have merit, I believe that encouraging young adults to leave home is generally more beneficialadvantageous. It not only helps them develop essential life skills but also encourages personal growth and resilience.
In conclusion, while staying with family offers certain benefits, such as financial and emotional support, the advantages of leaving home—such as fostering independence and personal growth—arehome - such as fostering independence and personal growth - are more compelling. Therefore, I support the notion that young adults should be encouraged to leave home when they reach adulthood.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongest in its balanced, logically developed treatment of both views, supported by relevant examples and a consistently clear preference for independent living. Its main limitation is that some reasoning remains familiar and general rather than probing conditions or exceptions. Deepen the comparison by explaining when family support may outweigh independence, and vary repeated wording around leaving home and personal growth.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses both views, sustains a clear opinion, and supports each side with relevant explanation and examples.
Add a more nuanced condition or exception to make the comparative judgement even more insightful.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is logically sequenced, clearly paragraphed, and cohesive devices guide the reader without drawing undue attention.
Create slightly stronger links between the advantages discussed and the final comparative judgement.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide, precise, and natural across the topic, with only minor repetition of central phrases.
Vary repeated references to leaving home, independence, and personal growth while preserving precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sentence structures is used accurately and flexibly, with only rare minor awkwardness.
Polish punctuation around parenthetical examples and continue varying clause patterns for maximum fluency.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people say that young people should be encouraged to leave home when they become adults, while others claim it is better if they remain with their family. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.