Do you think that modern technology, such as the internet and computers will ever replace the book or the written word as the main source of information?
Sample Response
Technology and technological inventions appear in different forms. Some parts of it affect the entire human lives and some parts of it function just for a short period of time for some selected part of the world or population. One of the distinctive shapes of technology is the Internet and computers by which our lifestyle is altered every year. Furthermore, it effectuates our source of knowledge. In centuries we just read books to obtain knowledge but computers, especially in recent years, have changed our viewpoints. As a direct result of advanced technology, our life became more comfortable than ever before. It is true for every aspect; even reading books and articles and gathering knowledge. Different capabilities of electronic books and websites are tempting enough to commence utilising this technology as soon as possible. For example, the ability to search online and getting necessary information promptly has revolutionised the way we look for something and the way we find the sources of information. Furthermore, the capacity of storing a great number of books just on the nail-sized chip has replaced the multistoried library into their online edition. In addition, the cost of reading will reduce due to not making use of physical paper. Along those benefits, we are capable of bringing e-books everywhere we go and this opportunity of portability is unique throughout the history of mankind. However, there is a widespread belief that making use of computers in every part of our life is abominable and leads to alienation. Also sometimes the cost of generating e-books is higher than physical books. Moreover, the wasting of energy for storing virtual books on servers is noticeable. To sum up, it can be argued that the merits of e-books outweigh its drawbacks and yet we should consider negative aspects and attempt to eliminate them.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix plural phrase Original: the entire human lives Suggested revision: human life as a whole Why it matters: The phrase needs a natural singular abstract form.
- 2. Natural phrasing Original: selected part of the world or population Suggested revision: particular regions or groups of people Why it matters: This expresses the limitation more naturally.
- 3. Wrong collocation Original: distinctive shapes of technology Suggested revision: distinctive forms of technology Why it matters: Technology has forms or types, not shapes, in this context.
- 4. Improve structure Original: the Internet and computers by which our lifestyle is altered Suggested revision: the internet and computers, which alter our lifestyle Why it matters: The relative clause is awkward and needs clearer grammar.
- 5. Wrong word choice Original: effectuates our source of knowledge Suggested revision: affects our sources of knowledge Why it matters: Effectuates means brings about, so it is not the right verb here.
- 6. Fix time phrase Original: In centuries we just read books Suggested revision: For centuries, people mainly read books Why it matters: This needs a clearer time expression and subject.
- 7. Use present perfect Original: our life became more comfortable Suggested revision: our lives have become more comfortable Why it matters: The sentence describes a change up to the present.
- 8. Simplify wording Original: commence utilising this technology Suggested revision: start using this technology Why it matters: The original is unnecessarily formal and less natural.
- 9. Parallel structure Original: getting necessary information promptly Suggested revision: get necessary information promptly Why it matters: This should be parallel with search online after ability to.
- 10. Natural article use Original: just on the nail-sized chip Suggested revision: on a nail-sized chip Why it matters: This is the natural noun phrase.
- 11. Clarify claim Original: has replaced the multistoried library into their online edition Suggested revision: has turned many large libraries into online collections Why it matters: The original collocation with replace into is incorrect.
- 12. Pronoun agreement Original: the merits of e-books outweigh its drawbacks Suggested revision: the merits of e-books outweigh their drawbacks Why it matters: The pronoun must agree with the plural noun e-books.
Suggested Rewrites
- the entire human lives human life as a whole
- selected part of the world or population particular regions or groups of people
- distinctive shapes of technology distinctive forms of technology
- the Internet and computers by which our lifestyle is altered the internet and computers, which alter our lifestyle
- effectuates our source of knowledge affects our sources of knowledge
- In centuries we just read books For centuries, people mainly read books
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The response answers the question and gives a relevant position that electronic books and online sources have more advantages than drawbacks. Development is generally relevant, with examples about search, storage, cost, and portability, but the answer shifts from whether technology will replace books to a broader merits-versus-drawbacks discussion.
State directly whether books will be replaced as the main source of information, then make each body point explain that replacement rather than only listing benefits of e-books.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas follow a recognisable order from background to benefits, drawbacks, and conclusion, but the essay is presented as one block and contains several abrupt links. Cohesion relies heavily on additive connectors such as furthermore and in addition.
Use clear paragraphs for introduction, digital advantages, limitations, and conclusion, with topic sentences that show the role of each stage in the argument.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is fairly wide and sometimes precise, such as portability, alienation, and virtual books, but there are unnatural collocations and word choices that reduce control.
Keep the strong topic vocabulary but replace awkward phrases with natural academic collocations such as forms of technology, sources of knowledge, digital libraries, and printed books.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses complex structures, but errors with articles, tense, prepositions, agreement, and noun forms occur regularly. Meaning remains clear, though some sentences become heavy and imprecise.
Edit long sentences for subject-verb agreement and article use, especially around technology, books, information, and e-books.