Do you think that modern technology, such as the internet and computers will ever replace the book or the written word as the main source of information?
Sample Response
Modern life has brought new tendencies to our lives and one of them is replacing books and papers by files and e-books. It seems that traditional libraries are changing to new digital ones and people are more interested in downloading books and magazines from the internet as digital files instead of purchasing them from a bookstore.
This is a reality that the mentioned trend is raising in each corner of the world and certainly, IT would be the main resource of information in the future but such as any other phenomena, it is necessary to find the reasons of using the internet more than books as a source of information in many societies.
Perhaps the most important reason is the price. In other words, when we are purchasing a book or magazine through the internet, we don't pay for papers. By contrast, we would be cost more for papers purchasing from a bookstore. Also, the availability is another reason as we can search the name or the topic of a specific book through some websites such as Google or Yahoo and would find thousands results for that as opposite to spend time and money for finding the book in the market.
However, some people worry about the effects of reading through computers on eyes health, I think this is less likely these days when the laptop and computer manufacturers are producing new healthy LEDs. But overall, this trend has helped human to save more energy sources and has had a critical role to prevent from deforestation as the wood has been the basic material for producing papers.
I think, therefore, technology has come to existence to help people have a better life and IT has been one of the best aspects of technology which makes our lives speedy, cheaper and easier to obtain information.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Unnatural collocation Original: new tendencies to our lives Suggested revision: new trends in our lives Why it matters: Tendencies to our lives is not a natural phrase for social change.
- 2. Wrong preposition Original: replacing books and papers by files Suggested revision: replacing books and papers with files Why it matters: Use replace with when naming the new thing that takes the place of the old one.
- 3. Imprecise wording Original: traditional libraries are changing to new digital ones Suggested revision: traditional libraries are being replaced by digital ones Why it matters: The revised wording makes the direction of the change clearer.
- 4. Awkward clause Original: This is a reality that Suggested revision: It is true that Why it matters: This is a reality that is wordy and unnatural at the start of the sentence.
- 5. Wrong verb Original: trend is raising Suggested revision: trend is rising Why it matters: A trend rises; raise needs an object.
- 6. Imprecise word Original: IT would be the main resource Suggested revision: digital technology will be the main source Why it matters: Source is more appropriate than resource when referring to information.
- 7. Wrong phrase Original: such as any other phenomena Suggested revision: as with any other phenomenon Why it matters: The comparison needs as with, and phenomenon should be singular here.
- 8. Passive error Original: we would be cost more Suggested revision: we would pay more Why it matters: The verb cost is not used in this passive form.
- 9. Missing preposition Original: thousands results Suggested revision: thousands of results Why it matters: Use thousands of before a plural noun.
- 10. Incorrect phrase Original: as opposite to spend time and money Suggested revision: instead of spending time and money Why it matters: Instead of plus a gerund is the natural contrast phrase here.
- 11. Wrong noun phrase Original: eyes health Suggested revision: eye health Why it matters: Eye health is the standard collocation.
- 12. Number error Original: helped human Suggested revision: helped humans Why it matters: Use the plural noun when referring to people generally.
Suggested Rewrites
- new tendencies to our lives new trends in our lives
- replacing books and papers by files replacing books and papers with files
- traditional libraries are changing to new digital ones traditional libraries are being replaced by digital ones
- This is a reality that It is true that
- trend is raising trend is rising
- IT would be the main resource digital technology will be the main source
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The response gives a clear view that digital information will become the main source and supports it with reasons about price, availability, health concerns, and environmental benefits. Development is relevant, but the essay focuses mostly on e-books and internet access rather than fully discussing whether the written word itself could be replaced.
Add one paragraph that directly weighs limits to replacement, such as printed books in education, legal records, or literary reading, before restating your final view.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body development, and conclusion, and the main ideas generally progress in a logical order. Cohesion is sometimes weakened by long sentences, overuse of this trend, and unclear referencing such as the mentioned trend.
Start each body paragraph with a specific topic sentence and use clearer referencing, for example this shift to digital reading instead of this trend.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for the topic and includes useful phrases such as digital files, source of information, availability, and deforestation. However, there are frequent collocation and word-choice problems, including trend is raising, papers purchasing, eyes health, and come to existence.
Revise common collocations for technology and reading, such as trend is rising, printed books, eye health, and came into existence.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses some complex sentences, but errors with articles, prepositions, passive forms, plural nouns, and clause control are frequent. Meaning is mostly clear, but several sentences sound unnatural or overloaded.
Break the longest sentences into two clauses and check each noun phrase for articles, plural endings, and correct prepositions.