The graph below shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000.
Sample Response
The bar chartThe given bar illustratesdemonstrates four different modes of transportfour different transportation that were usedwhich was used to travel to and from workfor travel and work in 1960, 1980 and 2000and in 2000 in a European city. Overall, it can be seen that car and bus usage over the period of time is an opposite trend with each other while train and tube were with each other too.
For car, in 1960, only 6% of people were using this mode of transportation which percentage grew to 23% and the peak of 36% in 1980 and 2000 respectively. Regarding bus travelFor bus, bus use was highestthe highest percentage of commuters used this transportation in 1960, at approximately 39%on account of over 37%. However, in 1980, it dropped from 38% to about 27% and then to 15%just a quarter and there to 15% in 2000.
Regarding tube travelFor tube, 18% of commuters usedhad used this mode of transportation in 1960, and after two decades, it had approximately the same proportionit had same proportion as the car had in 1980. In 2000 the percentage of commuterspassengers was precisely 25%. For train, 19% of commuters used trainsthere were 16% of people in 1960, and after four decades, it was 22% after peak up in 1960 to the same proportion as the tube had in 1960.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response is organised by transport mode and attempts to report figures for all three years, so the general subject remains understandable. However, the overview is unclear and several values or trends are inaccurate, particularly the 1960 tube figure and the train description, while frequent grammatical and collocational errors reduce precision. First, establish the four main patterns accurately, then express each comparison in simpler, controlled sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All four modes are mentioned, but the overview only partly conveys the main trends and multiple figures and changes are inaccurately reported.
State clearly that car use rose sharply, bus use fell substantially, and train and tube figures fluctuated, then verify every percentage.
Coherence and Cohesion
The mode-based paragraphs provide basic organisation, although mechanical openings and unclear referencing disrupt the progression within sentences.
Use direct comparative topic sentences and replace vague links such as there to and with each other with explicit relationships.
Lexical Resource
The response shows some relevant transport and trend vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate collocations make several descriptions unnatural or unclear.
Use precise combinations such as percentage of commuters, rose to a peak, and followed an opposite trend.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of structures is attempted, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, relative clauses, and sentence construction sometimes make meaning difficult.
Build shorter comparison sentences and check subject-verb agreement, articles, and clause boundaries before adding more complex structures.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.