In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?
Sample Response
Does freedom play a mandatory role in everybody?s life. We can see in today?s modernized era nobody likes to get some restrictions upon them, whether it would be a child or an adult. Some people think that there should behave some strict rules of behaviour for children, but I disagree with this statement. HoweverWherever it is a reality that sometimes more restrictions can cause more frustration in children, which leads to mental health problemsmany other mental diseases as well. Moreover, they may become stubbornthey can be, behave like a stubborn. Sometimes they feel under pressurefeel themselves under pressure, which can be the main reason for their poor performance in what they doin their field. In some cases, children may become more eager to do the thingswould be crazier to do these things that we try to keep them away fromfrom where we’ll try to keep them away.
On the other hand,In other words _ we have to look for other aspects as well, becauselike if we usually ignore our children?s bad habits, then they cannot become good human beingscan?t be good human beings in their future life. Moreover,Moreover_ if we never pay attention todraw attention upon the children?s main activities then they may fall into bad companymay be acquiring a bad company. They can learn the value of respectThey can know regarding the value of respect for their elders. They can know the importance of relationships. They can know regarding their cultural values as well.
In a nutshell, I would like to say that children should be taught the valuetaught regarding the value of their customs, rituals and respect towards their elders for their future life, but excessive restrictionsmost of the extra restriction should be avoided. It would be better to make them good human beings in the futurein their coming future.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response presents a consistent, qualified view that excessive restrictions should be avoided while children still need moral guidance. Its main limitation is that the supporting ideas are briefly asserted, sometimes unclear, and rarely illustrated, while frequent grammatical and collocational errors weaken precision. The highest priority is to build two clearly separated arguments with specific explanations or examples and express each one in controlled sentence structures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A relevant position is maintained, but the reasons are unevenly developed and several claims remain unclear or unsupported.
Develop each side of the qualified position with a clear explanation and a concrete example before drawing the conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response uses paragraphs and basic linking, although progression is uneven and several cohesive devices are mechanical or inaccurate.
Give each body paragraph one clear controlling idea and connect supporting sentences through logical cause-and-effect relationships.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss rules and child development, but frequent awkward collocations and word-choice errors reduce precision.
Use simpler natural combinations such as impose restrictions, feel under pressure, and fall into bad company, checking each phrase for accuracy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mixture of simple and complex structures is attempted, but frequent errors in sentence formation, agreement, articles, and punctuation limit control.
Prioritise complete sentences with accurate subject-verb agreement, then add complex clauses only when their structure is secure.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.