By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilty of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Sample Response
Punishment is the tool that society usesweapon which society uses to deter and reduce murderous actslimit and reduce murders’ actions. The type and severity of punishmentPunishment type and toughness are different according to the types of crime or action. The most serious crime, which is killing a person with premeditationwith previous planning, can lead the murderer to receive the death penaltyleads the murderer to the death penalty after making sure that he/she is the killer through clear evidenceproofs. This essay discussestackles and discusses two contrasting opinions. The first party believes that death penalty is essential and fair enough for killers. Whereas others see that it is fighting badness by badness and that does not generate good and balanced society. The first group of people who are in favour of the death penaltypro penalty death have their own logical reasons for their opinion. They say that nothing is equal to life but life itself. So any other form of punishment will not be sufficient or fair. A human body is a unique private property and if somebody causes damage to it or destroys it, he/she must suffer the same harmhave the same damage. In addition to that making a penalty extremely harshmaking penalty extremely harsh is considered as an effective deterrenteffective alarm or red light to whoever may think about committing crimes. Therefore the main aim of penalty will be achieved by reducing crime rates especially murderskilling crimes which have serious consequences without adequate compensationbad results without sufficient compensate. On the other hand, there are many people who believe that death penalty is not the best punishment they say that death of criminal or murder will not make the victim return to life. So it is not adequate compensationperfect compensate for victim’s relatives. Although it seems that by killing murder the balance of society will be restoredreturn, some experts believe that it will raise violence in the society. As a result, they recommend that life in prison sentence is better. That penalty makes the killer think constantlymakes killer think always about his crime. It is also lifelong mental punishment when he/she finds other prisonersprisons finish their sentences while he or she stayshe/she stash for the rest of his/her life. Finally, I agree with the first party because of the same reason which I have mentioned previously. Also, that opinion fits my religious belief as a Muslimas Muslim.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response considers arguments for both punishments and ultimately states a clear preference for the death penalty, with several relevant reasons on each side. Its effectiveness is reduced by the single-block presentation, delayed position, and frequent inaccurate word choices and sentence structures. The highest priority is to organise the essay into purposeful paragraphs, announce the position early, and develop the chosen view with precise, grammatically controlled reasoning.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the central choice, presents relevant arguments for both punishments, and reaches a clear conclusion, although the position appears late and some support is insufficiently developed.
State the position in the introduction and develop the strongest supporting reason with a concrete, logically explained example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a generally understandable sequence and uses basic signposting, but presenting the entire essay as one paragraph seriously weakens organisation.
Separate the introduction, opposing arguments, supporting arguments, and conclusion into distinct paragraphs with clear internal progression.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss punishment and deterrence, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word-form choices reduce clarity and naturalness.
Use standard legal collocations such as death penalty, life sentence, convicted murderer, and compensation, and verify unfamiliar words before using them.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Some complex structures are attempted successfully, but fragments, run-on sentences, missing articles, and faulty verb forms occur frequently.
Write shorter complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses while checking punctuation, articles, and verb forms.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilty of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.