Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this viewpoint and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Vegetarians tend to avoid consuming meat and fish foron the purpose of maintaining good healthkeeping body health and because of concerns aboutconcerning on environmental issuesissue. Both purposes will be discussed in this essay as well as provide several convincing explanations.
Vegetarians tend to consider health considerations when deciding to stop consuminghealth factors to stop consuming meat and fish because those types of foodthose kinds of food sources affect blood pressurethe blood tension of those who suffer from chronic diseasesdisease such as cancer and obesitysuch as cancer, obesity, etc. Another health-related reason people become vegetariansOther reasons from a health point of view of people become vegetarian because they need to lose weight or to achieve a preferred body shapeto have a better body shape. Moreover, choosing to consume vegetables rather than meat or fish has become a trendbecomes a trend to keep the body healthy.
Regarding environmental concernsOn the other hand, being a vegetarian is one of the ways to protest the policy of the government or criminal action against environmental issues such as cruel animal slaughterslaughtering, fish-bombing, etc. Moreover, vegetarianism is believed to bebeing vegetarian is believed as the best solution for keeping the balance of the ecosystem betweenamong humans and animals.
However, another reason not to eat meat or fish is related to ethical concern on how there are several values or rules in a certain community that forbid to eat both food sources. They believe that animals are just like the human being that should be respected as well as conserve their lives.
To conclude, vegetarians who consider health issues and environmental issues, as well as ethical concern, have their own reasons. In addition, both views are merely positive to keep the body health individually as well as to conserve the sustainability of animal lives globally.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response has a recognizable structure and covers health, environmental, and ethical reasons for vegetarianism, so its general direction remains understandable. However, the writer's own opinion is not stated clearly, and several claims are vague, inaccurate, or only briefly explained. The highest-priority improvement is to present an explicit position and support each main reason with a logically developed explanation and a credible example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response discusses several reasons for avoiding meat and fish, but the writer's opinion is unclear and key ideas are insufficiently or confusingly developed.
State a direct personal position and develop each claimed health or global benefit with accurate reasoning and specific support.
Coherence and Cohesion
The paragraph sequence is easy to follow and each body paragraph has a broad focus, though connections within ideas are sometimes mechanical or unclear.
Build each paragraph around one clear claim followed by explanation and evidence, using transitions that express the exact logical relationship.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss the topic, but frequent word-choice and collocation problems make several claims imprecise.
Replace unnatural phrases such as body health and blood tension with accurate, conventional health and environmental vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses both simple and complex forms, but frequent errors in articles, prepositions, agreement, and clause construction reduce control.
Edit sentence by sentence for verb patterns and noun phrases, especially constructions following reasons, concerns, and rules.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this viewpoint and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.