The graph below shows the fertility rate of women in different Gulf Countries from 1990 to 2000.
Sample Response
The given bar chart compares the fertility rates of women infrom six Gulf countries in 1990 and 2000. OverallAs is observed from the given data, the fertility rate decreased over the decadehas decreased over the decade and women inof Oman and Saudi Arabia had higher fertility rates than women in the other Gulf countriesa higher fertility rate than women of other Gulf countries. According to the bar graph, in 1990initially in 1990, the fertility rates (births per womanchildbirth per thousand women of a certain age range) in Bahrain, Kuwait, Qatar and the UAE ranged from about three to fourwere from 3-4. Women in Oman and Saudi Arabia had fertility ratesWomen from Oman and Saudi Arabia had a fertility rate of more than six births per womanmore than 6 in thethis same year. After ten years, these rates fellthis rate reduced in all six countriesall of the given 6 countries. This indicates lower fertility rates amongthe less fertility rate of women in the Gulf countriesthe women of the Gulf countries. The declination maintained a radio for each country and in the year 2000, the women from Oman and Saudi Arabia had a higher fertility rate than the women in other four Gulf countries. In summary, the childbirth per thousand women, which is also known as the fertility rate, in the Gulf countries decreased over the time.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response’s strongest feature is a clear overview that fertility generally fell and remained highest in Oman and Saudi Arabia. Its main limitation is factual and developmental: the chart measures births per woman, Kuwait did not decline, and few 2000 figures are reported. Prioritise using the correct unit and describing country-specific changes with precise values, especially the unchanged Kuwaiti rate.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The report identifies the overall decline and the two highest countries, but it uses the wrong unit, incorrectly says all six countries fell, and provides little precise detail for 2000.
Report births per woman, identify Kuwait as unchanged, and compare the two years with approximate figures for each country group.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response moves broadly from an overview to 1990 and then 2000, but the single paragraph, repeated conclusion and unclear middle sentence weaken progression.
Use a separate overview and organise details into two clear comparison groups: Oman and Saudi Arabia, then the other four countries.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is repetitive and often inaccurate, with errors such as “childbirth per thousand women,” “less fertility rate,” “declination” and “radio” reducing precision.
Use a small set of accurate terms consistently: “births per woman,” “fertility rate,” “fell,” “remained stable” and “proportion.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The main meaning is generally recoverable, but frequent article, preposition, agreement and comparative errors occur across the report.
Practise structures such as “rates ranged from 3 to 4,” “fell in five countries,” and “higher than those in the other countries.”
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the fertility rate of women in different Gulf Countries from 1990 to 2000.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.