The chart below shows the unemployment rate and the number of people leaving Ireland from 1988 to 2008.
Sample Response
The graph illustrates the relationship betweencomparisons among the unemploymentUnemployment rate and the number of peopleand group of people leaving Ireland between 1988 and 2008. Overall, the jobless rate and people leaving Irelandpeople who disappear from Ireland reached their highest levels in 1988are at the peak in the year 1998 and then over a span of 20 years, the unemploymentunwaged rate decreaseddecreases drastically and the number of people leaving Irelandat the same time group, people leaving Ireland also declined.
In 19881998, unemployment rate and number of people leaving Ireland werewhich is accounted for about 17%16% and about 65,000 people, respectivelyaround 60,000 people respectively and then shows fluctuations in jobless rate until 1996, followed by a sharp fall to 2004 and a slight rise by 2008.until 1994, after that sudden decline in the rate from 1996 to 2008
On the other hand, group of people evacuates from Ireland is at highest in the year 1998 and then gradually decreases from 60,000 in 1998 to around 25,000 in 2002, after that there was a sudden increase in the last 6 year periods which is accounted around 50,000 people in 2008
To sum up, over a span of 20 years unemployment rate decreased by about 11 percentage pointsdecreased around 10% whereas the number of people leaving Ireland also fell by about 15,000 peopledeclined by around 40,000 people.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response identifies the broad long-term decline in both measures and separates the two series into a recognisable structure. Its main limitation is severe factual inaccuracy, especially repeatedly treating 1998 as the starting peak instead of 1988 and misstating the size of the fall in emigration. The highest priority is to verify dates, units, endpoints, and turning points before writing the overview and details.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response recognises the overall declines and the later rise in emigration, but repeated date and value errors make several central features unreliable.
Correct the peak year to 1988, distinguish the two axes, and report the main turning points and endpoint changes with accurate figures.
Coherence and Cohesion
An overview and separate detail paragraphs provide a basic progression, but repetition, run-on sentences, and unclear references weaken cohesion.
Organise each series chronologically in complete sentences and use clear references to specific years rather than vague phrases such as after that.
Lexical Resource
There is some vocabulary for trends, but frequent inappropriate choices such as people disappear, unwaged rate, and evacuates make the description imprecise.
Use accurate neutral terms such as unemployment rate, people leaving Ireland, fell, fluctuated, and rose.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Some sentence forms convey the main trends, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, tense, clause structure, and sentence completion reduce clarity.
Write complete subject-verb clauses for each trend and check agreement and tense before combining ideas into longer sentences.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the unemployment rate and the number of people leaving Ireland from 1988 to 2008.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.