Write Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender? What is your view? Explain your position.
Sample Response
Nature has made males and females with different sets of characteristicswith a different set of characteristics and these differences in characteristicscontrasts in feature make them adept at certain tasks, according to the common belief in societycommon belief of the society. However, in this era, when gender equality has already been accepted and both males and females have provedboth males and females proved that they can be equally fit in any job, excluding a certain gender from a particular profession is no longer acceptable or wisean acceptable and wise option. To begin with, according to the common social dogma, women should stay at home, manage the householdtake care of the kitchen and bring up childrenup-bring children while men should have a career, earn money and maketake important decisions for the family. Though this was a widely accepted idea in the past, it has started changing and women in certain professions have outnumbered their male counterparts. For instance, the number of female teachers has already exceeded the number of male teachers in many countries according to an online report. On the other hand, men have proven that they can be as good as females in child care and nursing. The time has come to forget the old dogma and accept the fact that gender equality is no longer an optionis longer an option, but essential in the workplacea must in job sectors. Women are no longer ready to be confined to the homeconfined within the walls while males have forgotten their prejudices and started switching rolesstarted switching the roles. Furthermore, while selecting someone for a job, the authority should look for a suitable candidate and that person can be either a male or female. The widely held belief that women are less suitable in professions that require physical strength, logical reasoning, mental power, diplomacy and dealing with others is no longer acceptable in societyacceptable in the society. Many female presidents and prime ministers in the world have proved that it is a baseless theory and tech giants likelie Google, Microsoft, Facebook and Yahoo! doDo not employ people based on their gender, rather they put more emphasis on someone’s quality and potential. To draw a conclusion to the discussion, despite some physical differences, both men and women have similar talents and potentialpossibility. The old dogma of gender-based rolesrole is no longer tolerable in the modern era and this is why someone’s talent and skill should be the primary reasons for the suitability for a job, not the gender of the candidate.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response presents a clear, consistent position against gender-based exclusion and supports it with several relevant professional examples. Its main limitation is that the reasoning sometimes relies on broad assertions, while inaccurate collocations and the absence of clear paragraph breaks weaken precision and readability; the highest-priority improvement is to organise the two main arguments into distinct paragraphs and develop each with more specific, carefully worded evidence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is sustained throughout, with relevant arguments and examples that are generally developed.
Replace broad claims about social change with one or two more specific examples whose relevance is fully explained.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument progresses logically through social roles, workplace suitability, and a consistent conclusion, but the single-block presentation weakens paragraph-level organisation.
Separate the introduction, each main argument, and the conclusion into clear paragraphs with focused central ideas.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a reasonably wide topic-specific vocabulary, although several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural.
Prioritise precise combinations such as gender roles, professional suitability, and skills and potential, and proofread for missing words.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A variety of complex structures communicates the argument clearly, but recurring article, agreement, punctuation, and word-form errors reduce control.
Check each long sentence for complete clause structure, accurate agreement, and correctly placed punctuation before submitting.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Write Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender? What is your view? Explain your position.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.