Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Education is the fundamental building block for children’s development. However, the growth of students is very much dependent on the method of educationway of coaching. Some prefer educating students at home while others think it is necessary for children to attend schoolschools. In this essay, I will analyse both viewpoints before reaching a reasonable conclusion.
There are groups of people who consider that homeschooling hasconsider homeschooling has many benefits for a child's growthfor child’s growth. For instance, a student studying at home can get personal attention from parents, which resultsfrom parents which result in good academic results. Furthermore, parents are aware of their child's weaknessestheir child’s weakness and can help the childhelp him to cope with difficulties. Thus, it can be said that children can learn their subjects at a pace at whichat the pace in which they are comfortable and this can help them to excel in studies.
On the other hand, many consider schooling as an essential elementschools as the required element in student growth. Educational institutions, for example, concentrate on teaching moral values like tolerance and sharing alongside academic subjectsalong with studies. Moreover, studentsthey are encouraged to perform tasks in a team, enabling them to learn teamwork and not to be disheartened by failurenot to dishearten by failure. Therefore, chances of suffering from depression are reduced to a greater extent when they do not get what they desirein case he doesn’t get what he desired in the real world.
From the discussion aboveFrom above, it can be seen that both the viewpoints have their own merits. However, I tend to believe that in order to function in the wider worldsustain in the actual world, students should be motivated to attend schoolget educated in institutions rather than learning alone at home. It is thus hoped that the government will make school attendance compulsoryenforce strict laws for attendance in school compulsory.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay discusses relevant advantages of both homeschooling and school education and gives a clear preference for attending school. Its ideas are logically organised, but development is sometimes general or implausible, especially the link between teamwork, failure, and depression, while grammatical errors recur. Strengthen each advantage with a realistic explanation and example, and proofread agreement, articles, pronouns, and verb patterns.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both methods and an opinion are covered, but some supporting logic is limited and the final policy recommendation is not required or developed.
Explain one distinctive developmental benefit of each method with a concrete example, then justify the preferred balance.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear paragraphing and logical progression make the response easy to follow, though some referencing is vague and one causal link is abrupt.
Use explicit nouns instead of shifting pronouns and ensure each therefore follows evidence that truly supports it.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range for the topic, but several collocations and word choices are unnatural, including way of coaching, sustain in, and actual world.
Use education-specific collocations such as teaching method, individual attention, social skills, and function in the wider world.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex sentences is attempted, but agreement, articles, possessives, pronouns, and infinitive forms show frequent errors.
Check singular subjects and use parallel plural references when discussing children generally.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.