Healthcare cost is increasing, and many governments are finding it difficult to balance their healthcare budget. To tackle this issue, some people suggest that citizens should be solely responsible for their own healthcare costs with private health insurance, while others suggest that the government should provide free health services for all. Disccuss both views and give your own opinion.

Same questionCompare 3 different answers (Band 6–7.5)

Sample Response

1

A much-debated issue these days is whether citizens should take out private health insurance Deleteor not. The cost of providing free medical care for both the wealthy and the poor is far too highare far too great for any government, and most people agree that those who can pay for insurance should do soif you can pay for insurance, you should. In this essay, I will argue that everyone who can afford private health insuranceall who can afford it should be insured, but free medical care must be made available for those who cannot afford itthose too poor to do so. The most important reason for encouraging people to take out private health insurance is the cost of healthcare to the governmentcost to the government of health care. Free health cover for people who are able to pay for it is a waste of public money. Of course, people will only pay health insurance premiums if they know that they are getting good value for their money. If they get sick, they should pay very little or nothing at all. In addition, the privately insured are entitled to special benefits such as choosing their own doctorshaving the choice of their own doctors and being able to avoid long waiting lists for hospital beds. On the other hand, those who cannot afford to payreally cannot afford to pay private insurance premiums, which are often very high, are still entitled as citizens to the best medical care available – they cannot be expected to pay their own medical bills. However, if they are working, they should still pay a percentage of their wage (for example, 1% to 2%)(say 1 to 2%) as a tax that contributes toa tax which pays towards the cost of providing "free" medical services. In conclusion, most people should purchase private health insuranceprivately insure their health, but it is unreasonable to suppose that all citizens can afford it. Therefore, a safety net in the form of a basic free health care system must exist for the very poor and the unemployed.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.5

The response’s strongest feature is its clear, nuanced position: people who can afford insurance should use it, while a publicly funded safety net should protect those who cannot. Its main limitation is presentation, because the entire argument is compressed into one paragraph despite distinct shifts between private insurance, public provision, and the conclusion. The highest priority is to preserve the strong reasoning while separating these functions into clearly signposted paragraphs.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

8.0
Scoring rule

Both views are addressed through a well-developed, consistent compromise that considers government costs, insurance benefits, affordability, and shared funding.

Next step

Clarify whether the proposed payroll contribution applies only to recipients of free care or forms part of a broader universal funding model.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

The argument progresses smoothly through logically connected points, but the lack of paragraph breaks obscures its otherwise clear functional structure.

Next step

Separate the introduction, case for private insurance, case for public support, and conclusion into four distinct paragraphs.

LR

Lexical Resource

8.0
Scoring rule

Vocabulary is wide, precise, and natural throughout, with effective use of terms related to insurance, public funding, entitlement, and access.

Next step

Maintain this precision while varying repeated references to paying, affordability, and medical care where concise substitution is possible.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

8.0
Scoring rule

A wide range of complex sentences is handled accurately, with only rare minor lapses such as disagreement between ‘cost’ and ‘are’.

Next step

Complete a final agreement check so singular subjects such as ‘the cost’ consistently take singular verbs.

Put the feedback to work

Write this task while it is fresh

Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.

IELTS Writing Task 2

Healthcare cost is increasing, and many governments are finding it difficult to balance their healthcare budget. To tackle this issue, some people suggest that citizens should be solely responsible for their own healthcare costs with private health insurance, while others suggest that the government should provide free health services for all. Disccuss both views and give your own opinion.

Your response

Words0
40:00

Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.