The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider; the rich are becoming richer, and the poor are getting even poorer. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap?
Sample Response
People's income levelsThe amount of income of people is always an important topic in social sciences. The equilibrium of society depends on how this income is distributed among peopleshared among the people. Sadly, since the 1950swith the start of the 1950s, the gap between the poor and the richbetween poor and rich has become wider and nowadays this gap has reached its peakpeak point. The reason for this situation is the structure of our business system constructed over the yearsbusiness system we have constructed over years. This economic model is called ‘Capitalism’. Needless to say, the word Capitalism is derived from capitalis the derivative of Capital and obviouslyobliviously, one who has capital has the chance to improve his business and achieve prosperityobtain welfare. On the other hand, poor peopleguys are less likely to build a business because of a lack of capitalthe absence of capital. One of the ugliest results of the system is that itthis system is that this system makes people simply greedy. The community has started to think true happiness can be achievedreached only with more money. Another problem we face in this system is consumerism which means to have a good stable mood it is obligatory to consume more and more. In the futureIn future, if this economic model persistspreserves itself, it can lead to anarchy which may result in disasters and deaths of many innocents. To improve our lives, to beat this endless unhappiness, we should teach our children the importance of social justice. This problem is not going to be solved in the following several years. In the long run, we should change the way we understand lifethe way how we understand life. We must alter the roots and dynamics of our community. Nevertheless, we should preserve our hope because human beings havehad solved much more difficult problems in history. There is a great number of people who are aware of this problem. A modern social and economic structure should be formed to address this issue. The government policy to help the poor should be more emphasised and education in a country should be free so that poor people can educate their childrenmake their children educated. This educational opportunity can play a huge role to mitigate this immenseeminent gap. In conclusion, the social and economic formation and revolutionary changed in current capitalism is required to eliminate the gap between the poor and rich. More than three-fourth of wealth is owned by only 15% of the total population in the world. This is an unfair distribution and if not addressed carefully would only create chaos in the future.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response is strongest in recognising that severe inequality can promote consumerism, social resentment, and instability, and in proposing education and government support as responses. Its main limitation is that the discussion spends substantial space attacking capitalism, while several consequences are overstated and many solutions remain vague; the single-paragraph presentation also weakens progression. The highest-priority improvement is to develop two concrete social problems and match each with a specific, feasible policy mechanism.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both problems and solutions are addressed, but some content focuses on causes, several claims are overgeneralised, and proposed reforms are often insufficiently specific.
Explain precise consequences such as unequal opportunity or social unrest and connect them to workable measures such as progressive taxation, targeted benefits, or free education.
Coherence and Cohesion
A general movement from diagnosis to consequences, solutions, and conclusion is visible, but the unbroken paragraph and repeated broad claims weaken coherence.
Separate the response into an introduction, a problems paragraph, a solutions paragraph, and a concise conclusion with clear internal sequencing.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a reasonable range of social and economic vocabulary, but inaccurate word choices, informal phrasing, and repetition reduce precision.
Replace phrases such as “poor guys,” “obtain welfare,” “ugliest results,” and “eminent gap” with accurate neutral academic language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex structures are used, but errors in tense, agreement, articles, word forms, and clause construction recur throughout.
Check agreement and word form carefully, particularly in sentences describing government policies, historical change, and proposed reforms.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider; the rich are becoming richer, and the poor are getting even poorer. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.